


Descensus Averno facilis est

by scottmchungup



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Mortal Instruments Series - Cassandra Clare
Genre: 'how can i make it WORSE!', F/M, Gen, M/M, i thought 'hey remember how much CoHF hurt?'
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-27
Updated: 2017-03-05
Packaged: 2018-09-20 08:07:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 35,726
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9482171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/scottmchungup/pseuds/scottmchungup
Summary: What if it had been Alec who had given Asmodeus his memories? How would the shadowhunters get him back?Set after CoHF as an AU where Alec has no memories of his shadowhunter life!





	1. Alec through the looking glass

prologue

Alec Lightwood lived a very normal life, thank you very much. He was an only child whose parents had died just before he was eighteen, and while he missed them he’d never been exceptionally close to them either. His mother and father were far too prestigious to be concerned with home life, and from that had come a certain comfort to being alone. He was always alone, and not in the sad, empty sense. Just alone, and relatively fine with it. 

It was a dull ache when his parents died, and only a few months in foster care until he was out and living on his own at New York University. Aside from his brief time as an orphan, he’d had all the standard experiences any New Yorker might. He had a steady job, a professional major, and the craziest thing he’d done as of recently was jaywalk. 

He was normal, painstakingly so, and right now he was doing the very normal college kid thing of running late to class. His roommate had been the one to wake him, an anomaly as to why Garrett was up before noon in itself, and at 9:05 Alec was running to his nine am class. 

In his first semester at the university, he’d never been late, not once, regardless of the fact that he had chosen primarily early classes. Alec always woke up early. Even before his alarm clock could buzz away, he was already up and going for a jog, or making coffee, or reading elegantly in his crummy common area that smelled vaguely of rotten fruit and old milk. He was an early bird by nature or nurture or maybe both. Something about his bones just didn't seem to let him rest...

Today he'd blame it on his mind though. The previous night he’d had the most intriguing dream, one he could've sworn was more reality than fiction. There were shadows, and lots of them. Things that moved just outside of Alec’s vision and caused a sort of tension between his dream-shoulders. There were faceless people around, so many people that awake-Alec would be uncomfortable with the crowd but something about these people felt reassuring. Like running home, but the kind of home Alec wanted to be in. They smiled at him sometimes, and he’d smile back. There were two guys, and two girls that constantly kept reappearing. His whole life, he’d only known a few people, and even less he’d known intimately enough to feel what he was feeling in that dream. They were just flashes. Blonde hair on one, a chime-like laugh on another, green-gold eyes that seemed to hold the beauty of the world in their iris’… Apparently he’d been so caught up with these fake people he hadn’t bothered to rise this morning. And his class was almost clear across campus. Figures. 

He was just rounding on the Business building when he saw someone lounging on one of the benches that littered the walkway. There was always students milling around but something had caught his eye about her. 

She was beautiful; he could register that, but that wasn’t what struck him about the lady initially. She had a curtain of jet-black hair that fell in methodical ringlets around her startlingly pale face. Her eyes were deep, almost black-looking in the dim lighting and set a shocking contrast from her skin color to her dark features. She looked up as Alec ran past, something sparking in her eyes---- like hope, or recognition, or… something that Alec just didn't have time to analyze. Instead, he looked away as fast as he could, afraid to be caught for staring. She had pushed up to stand and Alec pulled the door to his class open fast to avoid whatever confrontation would start between him and this stranger. She had started to say something but it was lost in the finality of the door shutting and Alec almost felt bad for the nameless girl. Maybe she'd just wanted directions or something, and if Alec hadn’t been late to class he would’ve given them to her. 

Regardless he took an empty seat towards the back and pulled his computer out to take notes. Something unnerving settled in the pit of his stomach about breezing the girl off, but she was a stranger. In truth, he’d probably never see her again. 

 

xx.  
Edom was a big place. Extensive in size and capacity, with large towering buildings to make any man or lesser demon feel small. Even with the eight of them---nine including Jonathan’s body, they were mere specks in the full spectrum of Edom’s realm. Nothing, Isabelle thought, could make them feel smaller than in that moment. Nothing but the rise of Asmodeus. 

Even now, months later, Isabelle could still remember the way he towered over their posse, the way his voice drawled like a sickening lullaby, and the way she had felt as if the ceiling had collapsed on every part of her body individually. She'd broken bones before but never had her spirit been broken so cleanly.  
“The first two were free.” Asmodeus had gloated with a devilish grin. Jocelyn, Luke, and Jonathan’s body had vanished, but not before Isabelle caught a glimpse of the accords hall. Her stomach lurched, yearning for the comfort of Idris. With its white walls and air untainted with sulfur, her house with the bedroom just below her brothers, and her life--- chaotic but irreplaceable. She just wanted to go home. 

“The rest of you, well… that’ll cost you.” And his black eyes roamed over her friends like a feast, landing for just a second too long on Magnus. He was haggard looking and clearly exhausted, an easy target. Yet as soon as Asmodeus had singled him out, Alec had positioned himself in front of Magnus protectively, his right hand going backwards to find Magnus’. That was her Alec.  
Foolishly overprotective, and fiercely loving. She would’ve smiled at the sentiment had Asmodeus not continued. 

“Demons feed on memories, this even the simplest of shadowhunters know. But----you do not know the extent to which it fuels my race.” An anatomy lesson was the last thing Isabelle needed. “I require memories. A life-time’s worth. One of you will suffice.” He finished breezily, as if asking for the essence of who someone was like discussing the weather. Tedious and boring. Isabelle had taken a sharp intake of breath at his words. Magnus had said there was a price, but what he was asking was too grand. 

“And if we refuse?” It was Jace. Of course it was Jace that would dare to question a Greater Demon in its own domain. 

“Then you all stay here, and die, and I harvest your energy regardless. By all means, choose that path.” And even Isabelle, who loathed the slime before her could see he had a point. The ball was entirely in his court. In fact it was like Isabelle’s friends weren’t even playing the same game as Asmodeus. More like they were in the Colosseum, and Asmodeus was their king.

“So it’s just memories? We’ll all get to go back to our dimension, but one of us will just be a bit foggy on how we got there?” Simon, whose hand was wrapped tightly around Isabelle’s had replied this time. His analytical eyes already mulling over the problem ahead of them like it was solvable. He wasn’t a shadowhunter. He didn’t understand the extent of the demon’s words and was therefore infinitely more in danger than the rest of them. Izzy felt her iron grip on Simon tightened further, the rough marble of his skin indenting her hand.

“I require life-time memories, the kind that with all but erase your existence, Daylighter. But I am not cruel. I will allow you to stay in the mortal world, as a mundane. Happily puttering around as if you had not seen hell, and it seen you.” His eyes danced with fire as he finished, eyeing Simon hungrily. Like a lion and its prey. 

“Simon, you can’t….” Isabelle begged, a sound foreign to her own ears. “Maybe we can divvy it up? Each give a year or two that would add up to what Asmodeus is asking and still keep us intact, it----“

“That will not do, mortal. The strength of erasing a person completely is what I require. And do be diligent in your decision making, I do have somewhere to be.” Asmodeus said. Isabelle took a fleeting glance to look at everyone. Jace and Clary, with hard-set determined eyes that shown with love as they met Isabelle’s own. Magnus who limped slightly behind Alec, but who’s knuckles had turned white as they held each other's hands tightly. Alec had that funny look of contemplation on his face, his eyebrows crinkling in that adorably confused expression while he eyed Asmodeus skeptically. And finally there was Simon. Her loving Simon. He seemed to contemplate something silently, taking one fleeting look at Isabelle that made her want to hold him in her arms until the world stopped spinning. By the Angel did she love him. His lips parted, a silent I love you forming on his mouth and she knew exactly what he was going to do. 

“I----“

“I am willing.” Simon’s words were cut off by a voice that cut like a seraph blade. The voice of Alexander Lightwood. 

Now, as she stood in the corridor of some mundane college Isabelle could feel every painful patter of her heart. He hadn’t even taken a second look at her. He had seen her, made eye-contact with her, and kept walking. She had refuted the Clave, fought tooth and nail, swore up and down that Alec was still a shadowhunter and that he would remember her---or Jace, or Magnus easily if only given the chance. They were family, all it took was one look at Isabelle’s pointed nose, or arching eyebrows to see the resemblance. But when he looked at her, she could tell he saw nothing. Not a smile, or a breath, or a flicker of what they meant to each other. Isabelle let out a sigh that shook her whole body, falling back onto the bench and letting her head fall into her hands as tears pricked her eyes. That was her big brother. The same kid who fought with her, and not once against her. The one who taught her how to wield a Kindjal, and the one whose shoulder she cried on for Max. 

“Another brilliant success, I see.” It was Magnus. Dully-dressed in plain black slacks and a simple black vest, but still Magnus. Or what was left of him after Edom. He hadn’t been as restricted by the Clave in his pursuits of Alec, but he also hadn’t been persistent. Izzy knew with familiarity that he blamed himself for the whole occurrence. Alec’s entrance in Edom, and his heart-breaking exit, but Magnus had also been the first to see him in his new life, and Izzy had a sneaking suspicion that that was what was holding Magnus back from kidnapping Alec and bringing him home. 

Alec held himself differently. More assured in who he was, and less of a shadow in social situations. He by no means made an effort to be the center of attention, but he was definitely not as shy to show his happiness as before. He walked with purpose and none of the hesitance his shadowhunter self had in a crowd. He had a roommate he was getting along with, and he smiled easier… not knowing the pain he once had. He had friends, and went to small coffee houses with his peers, and looked at them as if he had nowhere else he’d rather be. Isabelle knew that Magnus didn’t want to take his happiness away from him, even if it meant breaking Magnus again. He looked almost as sick as he did in Edom. 

Isabelle looked up, but it was useless. Her eyes were rimmed with tears and all she could see from Magnus was a dark outline. Maybe it was for the best, she couldn’t stand to see the heartbreak on his face that she knew was like a mirror to her own. 

“He remembers, okay? He remembers, I know he does.” It felt like a plea, and her words came out between shaky sobs. How had she gone from one of four Lightwood children to one of two? 

She felt the weight shift on the bench and she knew Magnus had sat next to her and soon enough she felt his strong arm around her shoulders. He was shaking slightly too, and his head had come to rest next to hers. They sat there for some time, heads bowed and soft silent tears falling into their laps. It almost felt as if Isabelle was praying again. An act she hadn't done since adolescence, but one that felt infinitely more important than anything she'd ever asked the heavens for before. Eventually she knew she would have to pull herself together. Alec had always been strong enough for everyone, and now it was her turn to be strong enough to carry her brother. Nothing in this realm, or any other would make her give up on Alexander Lightwood. Not when she was the reason he was here.

Eventually the door adjacent to her opened up and out poured a sea of students. There was chatter and laughter and happiness dotting the crowd but both she and Magnus were now alert and watchful for one student in particular. He came out last, his worn sweater surprisingly light, accenting his downcast eyes nicely as he read some book with puzzlement between his brows. He looked angelic.

As soon as she saw him, she heard Magnus take a sharp inhale and Alec’s head snapped up. Blue eyes roaming over the pair. It was enough to make Isabelle’s vision almost go blurry again, but those deep sea eyes just looked at them quizzically. Not like a brother, or a (ex?)boyfriend, or even an acquaintance. Like a complete stranger. The names Isabelle Lightwood and Magnus Bane meant nothing to the boy in front of her. 

His lips had parted with an unsaid question, and Isabelle could tell Alec had spotted, and really taken in Magnus. For the second time today she was about to call out to him. Reach for him, cry for him, anything really! 

But a voice called from the other side and Alec’s attention was taken from them. 

“Alec!” The voice called, and just like that Alec was walking away from them. 

 

A/N: hello angels!! So I finished CoHF and I was like 'hmmmmm.... interesting.' when I read the epilogue, so without further ado here is angst! Let me know what you think, and thanks for reading!


	2. parabati lost

Jace could still feel his parabati bond, but now it was more of an ache than a comfort. Unconsciously his hand would move to the mark, and instead of feeling the steady thrum of a heartbeat all he felt was a chill. Something frozen that started from his mark and snaked down his spine, forcing him to shiver. 

He’d doubled his efforts into training, regardless of the futility of it. He felt angry, so angry at all times. Most of the stragglers around the New York Institute refused to spar against him now, because he rarely held back, all of his frustration coming out in his blows----and by the angel did Jace pack a punch. 

He was focusing on that punch now, practicing with a training bag and nearly causing the seams to split and his knuckles to soak in a deep scarlet. Vaguely he was aware of someone calling his name. But he didn’t care, the institute had no shortage of punching bags. 

“Jace! Dammit, stop!” Just as he pulled back a hand gripped his arm with strength, and regardless of how much he wanted to follow through with his movement, he let himself be restrained. He had never felt so out of control than he did now----even when the heavenly fire was licking at his veins. At least then he didn't feel like half of a whole. It was Isabelle now who found him. Isabelle with her face that looked so much like Alec’s. Isabelle with the same incredible stubbornness, and surplus of love that Jace did not deserve. It was the highest dishonor to betray your parabati, and instead they'd given him a medal. Technically they'd given 'thanks for saving our world' prizes to everyone who returned from Edom, but Jace's felt more like a slap to the face than praise. Who was he to be a hero when he couldn't save his own parabati? Maybe he had gotten what he deserved, with this hole in his heart. Maybe hell was really on Earth.

“Can you stop trying to kill the only brother I have left!” Isabelle screamed, her voice that was usually so steady and precise was now wavering, raising a few octaves with every word as her eyes pooled. Jace could count on one hand the number of times Isabelle had cried, and it broke his heart that four of the five times had all happened in the course of a year or so. She was now staring at him sternly, her free hand going towards his crimson painted fingers as if to hold them. He didn't understand how she could care about him anymore....or really how anyone could? Couldn't they see he was bad news?

“Alec isn’t dead, Izzy.” He yanked his arm free, turning away from her, and unwrapping the bloody tape from his hands. He could draw an iratze, make the pain fade away for a few hours before he'd do it again... but the memory of Alec’s face filled his vision instead. When he had told him he could heal like a mundane for punching that window. He’d heal now just the same, if anything to keep the pain as something physical rather than internal. 

He wanted so badly to be there for Izzy but she was just a reminder of his own failure. A reminder about who his recklessness really hurt, and how some wounds would never heal. The silence between them stretched on, and if Jace didn’t have cat-like hearing, he would have assumed she left. But there was no click of heels, no movement at all but the heavy breathing coming from Jace. 

“We’re dead to him.” She said, and Jace could feel his heart clench, like there was a dumbbell on it and slowly, so slowly, it would disappear altogether. His eyes closed as he focused on not losing his calm. Alec would have kept his cool. 

“That’s not fair.” He whispered, the fragility in his own voice scaring him. There was something poetic Jace had once heard about not knowing what was good until it was gone. But Jace had always known Alec was good, too good even, and now that he was gone he could truly see just how much he relied on his parabati. It wasn’t like he was walking around without an arm, or a leg, it was like he was walking around without his chest. Like none of his parts were connected if his soul wasn’t connected to Alec’s. 

"Has anything since Edom been fair?" 

"The new Accords?" Jace countered with ridicule, hoping to opt out of this conversation if he just annoyed her enough. He had a very important date with sulking that evening that he'd like to prep for. 

"Not the time for this sarcastic self-deprecating bullshit, Jace. You're not the only one hurting." And he could really see the pain in her eyes... As a new rule, Jace decided then and there to never look anyone in the eyes ever again.

She sighed then , and started walking towards Jace. This time he let her touch him, hold his hands as a sister who wanted to heal him rather than the girl who reminded him too much of what he had lost. They were both in the same sinking ship, and it wasn’t fair to drown her too. 

“Come on, fight club, we’re supposed to be meeting Magnus today.” She said this much more gingerly, wrapping his hands with the gauze that was lying on the table. He winced as she pulled on a particularly tender part of his knuckles. He didn’t know what a fight club was, but he did know he didn’t want to see Magnus today. All of his plans were either illegal or wildly impossible, and he’d rather not be reminded of the hopelessness of this situation. Or see Magnus, who he was getting vastly exhausted with. 

“I have to practice, Iz. I can’t keep running to Magnus whenever Alec bats an eyelash and Magnus thinks it’s a sign from the heavens.” He replied, his voice void of any emotion. By the angel did he wish it were a sign. But he tried to think of Alec as he was now, and something icy filled his insides. Alec would have no marks now. No deflection runes, or stamina runes, no archery cuts on his fingers. He wouldn't be Alec, and Jace wasn't sure he could handle a carbon-copy rather than the original.

“Weren’t you the one just saying he’s not dead? Practice what you preach, Jace, and have a little faith. Maybe Magnus found a way.” She finished with the wrap and turned to leave, the soft click of her heels reverberating through the empty room. He couldn’t keep hoping like this. Couldn’t keep feeling this breeze in his heart only to plummet to his destruction every time Magnus failed. On the same note, he couldn’t give up either. If there was even a slim chance that Alec, his Alec was in there, wasn’t it Jace’s job to dig him out? Or maybe he’d just end up buried with him. Either way, Alec deserved better. 

He didn’t say a word, just followed Isabelle out the door, and towards the street. 

After all, hope was the only thing he had left. 

 

Magnus had chosen some mundane dive in the city, probably because none of them had the heart to go to Taki’s.It was either nosy downworlders or pestering Shadowhunters that seemed to think it was okay to play twenty questions with anyone who was in the war. It used to be one of his favorite spots, but especially when he was with Clary----they were just too easy a target for the shadow world's gossip. 

This place was called Felicitious, a hole in the wall coffee shop littered with tired, twenty year old college kids. Luckily, Magnus was easily spotted in the crowd with his spiky black hair a few feet above everyone else’s heads, and Jace only had to navigate away from one group of chattering, giggling girls. In theory, Jace and Magnus should have gotten closer. Braiding each others hair, and trading cute stories about the boy they both loved, but Jace couldn’t help but feel resentful. It wasn’t his fault Alec couldn’t remember, but Magnus wanted to try something new constantly, letting Jace’s heart drop to the garbage chute every time it failed. He blamed magic, or rules, or anything otherworldly on their misfortune and Jace had no patience for the warlock's games. Thank the angel for Clary, who was always there to pick up the pieces. 

“Hey Magnus.” Isabelle said tiredly as she fell into the seat across from Magnus. She had deep circles beneath her eyes, and looked as if her last full night of sleep had been years prior. Jace assumed he couldn’t look much better, considering his best night of sleep had been a fruitful four hours. And that was after he’d fainted from a particularly rough training session.

“Isabelle, Jace.” Magnus responded curtly, with none of his usual theatrics. Instead he was reaching into his bag to pull out what Jace called the blacklist. It was a notebook entirely filled with their failed attempts to get Alec back. It made Jace sick just to look at it. Every scheme, every theory, every attempt only solidified what they already knew. It shouldn’t have been Alec who paid the price. They'd consider summoning demons, or angels, or using Clary's adaptive rune making skills and not a single one of them fleshed out correctly. In fact he'd gotten a pretty bad burn from some lesser demon that he'd yet to fix up yet either out of spite or pride. Maybe a mixture of both. 

“I’ve got somewhat of a plan, but this directly involves you Jace.” Magnus announced, his steady green-gold eyes looking suddenly old, despite his young features. Jace could really see where the years had touched Magnus Bane. 

“I know we’ve tried using your Parabati bond before but, this time I think I could do a kind of reverse magic to ignite the wearer of the other mark. It hasn’t been done---but that doesn’t mean it can’t.” Magnus proclaimed, leaning over his notebook as if he could drop dead on it as they were speaking. Even he didn’t believe in the plan, and Magnus knew how sensitive Jace was about using his parabati bond. It wasn’t gone---just ghosted, and Jace feared any tampering with it would force it to disintegrate altogether. 

“No way. Find another parabati to use, you know as well as I do this won't work. ” Jace said sourly, remembering Izzy’s description of the new Alec. She and Clary had ventured out one day and come back with ghost stories of a tall man who looked just as Alec once had. Jace had been the only one who hadn’t seen him yet. He wasn’t allowed to directly approach Alec, and Jace knew that upon seeing him he would damn the Clave’s rules and shake him until he remembered all their bickering, all their bonding, all their love. Although in truth, shake-therapy was somewhat frowned upon by the Clave. It came dangerously close to threatening a ‘mundane’. But if history proves anything it's that Jace doesn't give a fresh fuck about the rules. 

“Jace---“ Magnus started again, moving his slender fingers to rub deep circles on his closed eyes, as if Jace’s stubbornness was physically exhausting Magnus. Good, Jace thought bitterly. Now he knows how it feels to be on the butt end of Magnus' mad science failures. He had just opened his eyes when he was about to continue, until they flicked upwards at the sound of the opening door chime, and widened like he’d just seen a ghost.

And he had. A tall, gangly man had just walked in. His blue eyes alight with humor at something his companion said, and his smile so big, and so bright Jace thought he might have to wear sunglasses inside. He looked the exact same, and yet entirely different. His pale skin looked less shocking then Jace remembered, as the dark ink marks that used to litter his arms and neck were gone. And not faded, where the lines could still be traced if one squinted---but void entirely on his skin. It was clear, almost translucent. He held himself higher too, and his full height was achieved, that familiar mop of black hair fresh cut and pushed lazily to the side. He still wore sweaters----ugly things with holes in the hems and fading colors that didn’t accent his body well. He was entirely like and nothing similar to the Alec Lightwood Jace knew. This. This is what he was afraid of.

“Oh.” He heard Magnus breathe, as if the air from his very mouth had been sucked out. And Jace could only think ‘same’ in response. Oh was right. Alec, their Alec was just within their grasp and yet had never been so far away. 

“That’s what Richard said----“ The man who wore Alec’s body said, rolling his eyes with familiarity at the man he was talking to. They were walking towards the counter, Alec not even giving the trio a sparing look. His voice made Jace's chest physically pain with longing. They used to fight like siblings did but he would give anything, ANYTHING if it meant even a quip from Alec. 

“He’s not supposed to be here.” Magnus said in a low voice, his eyes large and full of sorrow. “He-----he’s never here on Thursday’s, he’s got a class usually, he shouldn’t be here.”

“Stalking him, are we?” Jace asked sarcastically, but with none of the fun he usually iced his words with. This was just the auto-pilot Jace was working on. He couldn’t stop staring at the back of Alec’s head. He hadn’t even stopped at their table, hadn’t given them a second thought, or a first at that.

He was ordering coffee now, and finally Jace could register something other than numbness. Izzy had been grabbing his wrist with strength, her knuckles turning white as she did. He honestly wasn’t sure whether she’d breathed yet, and without thought his free hand came to rest on hers. The Lightwood’s, together again. A bitter thought that tasted something like sorrow. He had to wonder if Max were to walk through those doors right now, would Alec just think it to be some kid? Jace could still see with stark clarity the emptiness in Alec's eyes on his little brother's funeral. Nothing about him now showed that sorrow.

“I keep detailed tabs on him, yes, shadowhunter, in case he talks about demons or starts shooting arrows into the nearest corner.” Magnus replied, his eyes closed now, almost meditatively, like the sight of Alec hurt him too much to bear, and Jace could definitely understand that. 

Alec had since ordered his drink, and stood to the side waiting for his coffee-----black-----and talking animatedly with his friend. Jace felt a foreign stab of jealousy for the man. He got to talk freely with Alec, got to joke with him, and laugh like friends did, and Jace, his brother, had to watch from the sidelines. 

“Thanks.” Alec had said to the barista that gave him his coffee, and Jace had acted on instinct as Alec turned to leave.

No, he couldn’t leave just yet, Jace had barely gotten to see him, gotten to hear his gruff voice, and Jace was greedy like that. Always wanting more from Alec. 

Without realizing It, Jace was suddenly in front of the raven-haired boy, his wide familiar blue eyes staring at Jace with nothing but curiosity in them. No recognition, just questions. 

“Hey!" Jace called, startling almost everybody in his immediate vicinity. He could see now that had been too eager, but being who he was he tried to brush it off with nonchalance. Alec seemed the most confused as Jace's eyes were trained solely on him, and Alec, after a few uncomfortable beats finally realized Jace was in fact talking to him.

"Hi?" he said, a question and a statement all in one. Everybody else had gone back to their scheduled conversations except for Alec and his friend, probably wondering whether Jace was some tattooed lunatic about to scream at them some more. Well they were half-right.

"Sorry I uh...." Jace internally punched himself. What was he going to say now? Sorry I just wanted to let you know you're a shadowhunter and surprise! I'm your brother? Sorry I'm a stranger but you need to come with me right now so i can draw one of these weird tattoos and see if you survive? In that moment Jace decided to do some very quick thinking and let his mouth do all the work. "I'm Jace, I think I'm in your class." He finished lamely, blatantly ignoring the heated stares from both Isabelle and her wonder-bro.

Alec took a beat to respond. "Oh, okay, I'm Alec..." he trailed, still wondering what this Jace wanted. "Which class exactly?" 

"Accounting." Jace responded automatically, setting a mental reminder to thank Magnus for his 'stalking' so Jace wasn't completely shooting in the dark. He was off to a good start, but they needed to get somewhere safer, more private so Jace could assess Alec's true state. "I uh, I'm actually not doing so hot in that class and I was wondering if you maybe tutored?" A pathetic excuse, but enough, he hoped to get the skepticism off his back. 

Alec still seemed unsure, but instead of telling Jace to take a hike or whatever he just kind of stuttered on his words till he formed a coherent thought. "I---uh, I.... yeah sure. I think I remember you, from class." The boy answered, his blue eyes still guarded. Yes! Jace thought triumphantly, they were getting somewhere! Even if 'remember you from class' was most likely an Alec bluff to make some random coffee-house weirdo feel better jace would take it in a heart beat. " I kinda can't right now though, how about... Sunday?" 

"Sunday works for me."

"Alright, I'll uh--- I'll text you with the address?" Jace was already plugging his number into a very archaic smart phone that Alec had handed him before his sentence was even through. It bothered him slightly that 'Jace' was a new entry in anything of Alexander Lightwood's but he'd let his pessimism slide this once.

"Cool." Alec said, turning towards his friend and giving some kind of tacit signal to leave. "bye." The pair said, and with a twinkling of the bell on the door, he was gone, Jace's heart echoing in his ears. 

Isabelle flanked his left side, Magnus staying stationary at the table shaking his head disapprovingly. "Jace what've you done." Isabelle asked in a small voice, and only then was Jace reminded of the 'no contact' rule. Rules were meant to be broken, one part of his brain said. The other, however, was wondering which cell would be his in the city of Bones.  

A/N: Thank you so much for the support!!! I promise we'll have more progress with the next few chapters, I have something special in mind!!! Hope you enjoyed this, let me know any thought! :-)


	3. accounting troubles

A/N: first off, thank you SO much for the support!! It really helps me get chapters out faster and seeing people excited to read my stuff makes me so happy! You are all so amazing!! Also, I apologize in advance for the excessive angst :-)

 

“You know you can’t go, right?” 

Jace had just finished throwing on his leather jacket when Isabelle’s voice rang out, making the blonde hesitate ever so slightly in his wardrobe finishing touches. He sighed, his back to her as he reached for his phone and bag---- a backpack he had bought specifically for the occasion. 

“And are you going to stop me?” He questioned, mindlessly throwing items into his bag so that he didn’t have to face the wrath of his sister. 

"The Clave won't pardon this, Jace."

"Are you going to stop me?"" He repeated. 

“Would it matter if I tried?” She sounded tired instead of confrontational, and knowing Jace had won this fight he turned on the balls of his feet to face her. The lights in his room were dim, and the lighting cast odd shadows on Isabelle’s usually pristine face. She seemed to have aged several years in the course of a few months, and right now her cherry red lips looked plastered in a frown. It must be a genetic Lightwood scowl. 

“No, it wouldn’t.” Jace amended thoughtfully. It wouldn’t have mattered if Raziel himself had been standing at his doorstep begging him not go, Jace would have pushed past the heavenly light and probably flicked him off in the same motion. Clary had left for Idris that morning, and she was really the only one with a fighting chance of stopping Jace once his mind was made up. He was tired of sitting around, and this was the best course of action. Not to mention direct contact with Alec was welcome. Something about Jace had to strike Alec as familiar. Jace had purposefully worn a low hanging shirt so that his parabati rune could just be seen over his collar. He only needed to bend over so slightly, point something out in a book or pick up a pencil, and Alec would be able to see the connection.

“And----“ Jace took a quick look at his phone, “Simon is here already so, I really must be going. You know how Alec hates tardiness.” He gave Isabelle a quick grin and a soft kiss on the forehead as he passed, hoping his long legs could take him far enough that Izzy’s reprimanding wouldn’t reach him. It didn’t work, but her words were lost after something about Magnus that Jace didn’t bother to register. Magnus would have to wait. 

Jace could see Simon’s beat up van from where it idled, and probably stalled on the curb, but Simon himself was gone from the driver’s seat. Jace felt a surge of fear go through him, that Simon with no mark of Cain had gotten himself into something stupid and unmistakably Simon, and now they’d have to deal with that on top of everything the Dark War left behind. Jace honestly wasn’t sure whether Isabelle could take another blow to the heart like this, and Jace himself could already foresee the seismic self-hatred building up. Simon wasn’t a mundane, but he was definitely still their responsibility. Clary had been through too much to lose her best friend, and so Jace would save Simon given any circumstance. 

His fears were soon clenched however, by the tuft of brown hair leaning on the opposite side of the van. Jace would’ve said something snarky about day-walking vampires and how Simon could somehow even make them uncool, but he saved that comment for a later time. Right now, it was time for questions. 

“What are you doing here?” Next to Simon stood Magnus Bane, in all his weary magnificence and looking almost disinterested in the happenings of the day. He still held his shoulders back, Jace assumed that was just a product of elitism, but ever since Edom it had seemed like Magnus was starting to understand Atlas with the way he walked. 

“Much to your humble surprise, I’m not here for you.” His velvety voice responded, cat eyes rolling with annoyance. Well, that was obvious. The day Alec had walked into Magnus’ apartment was the day Magnus had officially become uninterested with all other shadowhunters. Well with the exception of Clary, and that was different. Jace couldn’t think of a single person who wouldn’t fall in love with Clary Fray. 

“You’re not in accounting, Magnus. He’ll be freaked out if I show up with a plus one, especially since you've been hovering his life lately. Not to mention, the Clave still hasn’t sanctioned a rescue. That’s why Izzy isn’t here.” Jace responded, a little tiffed that Magnus was ruining the one plan that might actually hold substance. 

“Oh and you’ve suddenly enrolled in NYU? Jace, let’s save the theatrics, for once, and be completely clear on one thing: I do not care what the Clave sanctions. You’re going to see Alexander and so are Sheldon and I. I hardly trust you not to grab Alec’s hand and draw a rune on it, regardless of whether his body accepts it or not. So consider me your stabilizer.” Magnus’ eyes burned with fury then, the gold in his eyes turning to something darker that accented his features into the warlock Jace could understand people fearing. He had a point, Jace had thought about doing just that frequently. But wouldn’t it have been just like Asmodeus to take ‘being a mundane’ too literally? Wipe Alec’s strength away with the wave of his hand, and allow his friends to be the ones to kill him. A rune on a mundane would not only kill Alec, but drive him crazy. 

“Alec is by all rights and reserves a mundane. And you are a reckless shadowhunter with little to no say in this situation.” Magnus turned then, his spiky black hair nearly impaling Simon, and moved to get into the van. Simon gave Jace a sidelook and a small shrug, as if to say ‘what he said, I guess’, and moved to the drivers side. Jace let a profanity pass through parted lips and followed them both inside. 

“So what, and I supposed to show up and be like: surprise! Your ex boyfriend is here and oh, so is the guy currently making out with your sister!” Simon made some noise like a grunt, voicing his opinion on being dragged into this cat fight between Magnus and Jace. But Magnus just shook his head. He had seen the way Magnus had flinched when Jace said ‘ex boyfriend’, but honestly he was too pissed off to care. He had barely gotten Alec to agree to this ‘tutoring’ thing, and bringing two new kids that definitely weren’t in his class wasn’t going to help their budding relationship. 

He’d assumed it would go steady--- Jace would arrive, Alec would talk about something boring like civic duty or the joy of following the rules, Jace would casually bring up the shadow realm, and in an angelic light with church choirs singing in the background Alec would remember. Or something like that, he was open to suggestions. 

"For the record, I'm just a bystander." Simon said, probably thinking he was tranquilizing the high tension. 

“Text him your roommates are joining you, you're clever with your lies usually.” Magnus replied, with nonchalance. 

“Roommates?” 

“Believe me, I’m not particularly enthralled about it either. Last time you were a terrible house guest, I only survived it by trading you in.” Magnus responded bitterly, keeping his eyes focused on some point outside the window. 

“You know, you and Clary stay over at my apartment enough that it’s not technically a lie.” Simon added happily. Izzy and Jace were notorious for leaving the institute, especially since Jace had turned eighteen. Being a minor Izzy could seldom stay, but Jace and Clary who had no curfew tended to hole up in what was once Jordan’s apartment. Just another reminder of Jace’s failures, but selfishly comforting when surrounded by Clary. And in some retrospect’s, Simon, but Jace would never admit to that. The Institute just seemed so hollow now, holding none of the luster it used to except for a weapons bay to die for. 

Jace had texted Alec, and Alec had been surprisingly okay with it. There was still nothing in Alec’s vocabulary that jumped out at Jace as being something of the Alec he knew, but then again Alec had always been a boring texter. Maybe that was their sign. 

“If you are my roommates, then someone in the housing department must really hate me.” Jace added before the van lurched to a stop. Jace pulled on the rusty handle and just before he got out he could’ve sworn he heard Magnus breathe “I know someone who hates you.” with just enough sarcasm to make Jace’s mouth twinge into a smile. At least some things would never change. 

Alec’s apartment was much less spectacular than the New York Institute in Jace’s completely unbiased opinion. It was entirely red brick and seemed to be crumbling around the edges. The stairs were that weird rusted brown color, and with every step Jace felt as if he were unscrewing a bolt and therefore minutes from plummeting to his end. If he hadn’t had such a drastic death wish, he might’ve been scared but Jace just continued on to the spot that Jace knew Alec was at. 

Room 328 was on the third floor, tucked away so far in the corner that Jace would have missed it had Magnus not been leading. Figures Magnus would even know where Alec lived---- so much for staying away from Alec’s new life. 

Simon pulled up the rear as the three of them gathered around the front door. Jace was distantly reminded of the Institute, and Alec’s room that had been somewhat an extension of his own. He had always been a door knock away, and regardless of the fact that Jace’s hand had balled to swiftly rap the door, this could never be like it was. And maybe it never would. 

“Coming!” A voice called somewhat muffled, forcing Magnus to stiffen next to him. Jace elbowed him lightly as a reminder to keep his cool and the door was pulled open. Alec gave them all a small smile, lingering a fraction of a second too long on Magnus, a light crimson already pooling his cheeks. At least Alec’s instincts were still exactly what they once were. 

“I’m Alec.” He said hurriedly, offering his hand to shake Magnus’. Magnus seemed a bit dazed, but functioned just fine as he grabbed Alec’s hand and shook it. The first real smile Jace had seen in months dotting his lips for the smallest fraction of a second. “Magnus.” He responded, his green-gold eyes never wavering from Alec’s gaze. 

“I’m Simon. Simon Lewis, to be exact but Simon works just fine.” Simon rambled, somewhat predictably. Having Magnus come, Jace could understand. He may be a romantic sap around Alec but he had enough rationale to play the part. Simon however…

“Simon.” Alec repeated after having taken his eyes off Magnus, and at Simon’s agreement Alec just nodded towards Jace. Nodded. Like they acquainted, but not actually friends.  
Alec stepped back to let them into the apartment, a dingy thing with an overwhelming theme of ‘brown’. It was immaculate besides a few stray dishes here, and a shirt thrown lazily over one of the chairs---it was red, so it couldn’t have been Alec’s. They moved inside and Jace could see the minor details of the room. There was a poster of some video game on the wall above the couch, a TV with two controllers in front of it, and a few frames on the partition between the kitchen and common area. Alec’s shining features stood out in a minority of the pictures, his face feeling like multiple gut punches to Jace’s already unsteady stomach. Alec genuinely thought that this---these pictures were his past, and not training days and demon hunting with Jace. Memories the blonde would hold on to for forever, and ones his best friend had already forgotten. 

“I had uh---I told Jace I’m not really anything special in Accounting, just lucky on his last test but we can go over the study guide if you guys want? I’m going to grab a water, if anyone wants anything?” He asked, and the three shook their heads as Alec disappeared into the kitchen. 

Magnus sighed, letting his shoulders fall for the first time since entering the dorm, but it was Simon to speak up first. 

“This is actually a much better introduction than the first time I met him, we might actually get along----do you see his World of Warcraft poster?.” He quipped, but quickly fell silent at Jace and Magnus’ stares. 

“We will not ruin this life for him, Herondale. Nothing of the Shadow World, do you understand me?” Magnus’ voice was stern enough, but his eyes held something stronger. There was power in Magnus, Jace knew that, but what Jace also was knew was that Magnus did not mess around when it came to Alec. Even if it wasn’t their Alec. There were few limits to Magnus’ extent of power in the dealings of the eldest Lightwood. 

"Yes, dad." Jace exaggerated, making a point to show his disgruntled persona openly. He already had the Clave breathing down his next the last thing he needed was another authority figure to blatantly ignore. 

“Well, I’ve got the study guide if you guys want to go over it.” Alec announced, his lanky figure coming into view. Surprisingly enough, he looked good. His blue eyes seemed to hold more of a steady calm then an all-encompassing stress, his face full instead of sunken and soot-filled like in Edom, and his words held a surety shadowhunter Alec had never possessed. Jace couldn't help but question whether it was because he no longer felt like he was sidekick to Jace's headline.

“Yeah, sure, that sounds great Alec.” Simon answered, clearly making up for the fact that both Magnus and Jace had fallen silent. “Magnus and I didn’t bring much so we’ll just follow your lead.” Alec nodded, motioning towards the kitchen table. He sat down at one end, Magnus on his right, Jace on his left, and Simon across. Alec was already going through the first question, talking about probabilities and fallacies and altogether boring Jace. If they were going to drag him out of the shadows didn't he need a little light? 

“You know, my sister took this class. I think she had some finished study guides, from way back when. ----Do you have any siblings, by chance?” Jace knew he was stretching but it was just right there. Isabelle had always been Alec’s shining star, and getting him to remember even a nail on his sister's finger was a step in the right direction.

Magnus was shooting daggers at him from across the table, but Jace knew that if he simply did not look over then it wasn’t really happening. He was only half certain Magnus wouldn't magically drop a ceiling tile on his own blonde head, and silently he kind of wished for it. That would mean Magnus was the one who exposed them. Alec hadn't even noticed the silent confrontation, just sat with a puzzled expression, and Jace couldn’t bear to let himself think that it was because he was getting flashes of something. Of a girl with wavy black hair identical to his own, and two brothers who loved him and bothered him all in the same breath. In truth, he was probably just trying to figure out whether to tell his life story to a stranger or not. 

His practical side seemed to die as he answered, “No, I’m an only child.” 

Every now and then his eyes would move to Magnus, but every time that happened he’d quickly look back down, lifting the papers just so that the remnants of his blush were barely visible. Simon spent his time eyeing lustfully the video games below the TV. Was Jace really the only one who could freaking focus right now??

“It’s pretty comprehensive though, I doubt we’ll have problems with it.” Alec added, his eyes still staring pointedly at the papers instead of the faces around him. Jace reached into his bag mindlessly, playing the charade of ‘college kid struggling’, while still trying to dive in further for information. 

“Yeah, you’re right. It’s just my parents are crazy about grades. But you know how it is, right?” He tried to form the words as he always did, nonchalantly, but something about them just sounded so careful, and so un-Jace. 

Magnus coughed, forcing Jace’s attention to meet his. “Jace, I highly doubt Alexander here wants to discuss his private business.” Magnus said through gritted teeth, his scowl made it clear there was no room for arguing. 

“No, it’s alright. My parents actually died a while ago.” Alec answered anyway, his eyes open and devoid of any hurt, any sign that the passing of his parents had affected him. Strangely enough, Jace found this to be a minuscule sign. Maybe this was where the foundations started cracking, Alec always felt everything so strongly and if he couldn’t remember even feeling sad about his parents; that could very well mean the memory was so hazy it could break. Break into the deep confines of his mind where Jace knew the Lightwood family still lie. He was about to ask another question, deeper this time, until something curious crossed over Alec’s features. “Wait---how did you know my full name was Alexander?” Alec asked, letting his eyes meet Magnus’ once again. 

Secretly, Jace couldn’t help but be a little smug in that moment. So it hadn’t been Jace who slipped up. Suck it, Warlock. 

The only signal that Magnus had lost some of his perpetual cool was in the slight panic in his eyes; but it was so slight that even Jace who saw him on a weekly basis barely registered it. Everything about him now radiated a lax attitude if you didn’t know the man well. He simply said, “Oh I took a wild guess that Alec was short for something.” And made no other motion that he was worried about having been trapped in his own web. 

Alec however still looked like he was contemplating something. “No, you’re right. It’s just someone I knew used to call me Alexander…” He let the sentence trail off, his eyes dropping to focus on the table. Jace could see Magnus from the corner of his eye, gripping the table so hard it might snap in half. Alec was so close, so very close…

“My Aunt! That’s who, she used to call me Alexander whenever I’d done something wrong. Sorry, probably a little too in depth for a study session.” He laughed, and the three followed suit politely despite the fact that Jace had found the whole ordeal wholly unfunny. Just like that, Jace had once again been shot. Alec was truly gone. If even Magnus, seated this intimately near Alec couldn’t jog his memory, maybe the Clave had been right in their regards to sit out of his progress. Maybe a rune would drive him crazy, he was almost as mundane as Simon had once been---and that’s saying something. At least he seemed happy. With his life, and his friends, and his choices… and Jace had no right to remind him of all that he’d lost in another lifetime. The heartbreak Magnus had caused him, the look of Isabelle in Edom when she had been so close to slipping through their fingers, Max… 

"I mean what's a study session without pouring your life story out to strangers?" Simon joked more so to himself than anyone else. If Clary were here she might have indulged the daylighter in his humor but Jace was far from in the mood. Alec seemed to realize in that moment that was actually exactly what he was doing, and Jace could virtually see how he shut down immediately. Any questions about his personal life were clearly unwelcome now.

They continued on with boring small talk, and Jace always lightly trying to breeze the subject of Alec's past. Eventually they got to the end of the horrid 'studying' they'd been doing when Alec got a phone call and excused himself for a moment. 

"Still think you're a tactical genius?" Magnus asked smugly. Jace knew rationally he wasn't happy about the situation either but with their constant bickering he could see where one might relish in being right. He could understand it, but he definitely wasn't going to accept it.

"I got you on a first name basis other than 'guy I creepily see everywhere' so yes, Magnus, you ARE welcome." Before Magnus could react, Alec came back, talking about how he had to be somewhere and he was sorry.

"It's cool man, there's only so much analytical processing one man can do a day, right?" Simon responded, getting up from the table and starting the procession out. Alec actually smiled at this idiocy, politely if nothing else but Shadowhunter Alec would be rolling in his grave had he ever known he'd laugh at one of Simon Lewis' wisecracks. 

They began the funeral procession out, Jace's form already out the threshold when Alec spoke up again. “Oh, well uh, here----you can take my notes if you want, you know, to study? I already did the homework.” Jace accepted the notebook handed to him with a small smile. His head was suddenly pounding and he felt exceptionally queasy. He needed to see Clary... 

“Thanks.” Jace said, “I’ll see you in class, Alec.” He finished, and left without a second look. Simon had flanked him, but Magnus had stayed back for just a second, asking a question Jace hadn’t bothered to listen to. He’d been in graveyards, he’d been to the city of Bones, he’d seen people die in front of him, but never had he felt so haunted then in that apartment. 

 

A/N: Again: THANK YOU READERS! you are amazing & I appreciate your kudos/comments/etc. Let me know who's POV you'd like to see more of! I think I'm going to take this in a different direction than Shadowhunter Academy did with Simon because Alec is so different in that he was never a mundane before. We'll see, but I'd love to hear from you what you'd like to see! Suggestions are always welcome and appreciated :-) I'll get some more Malec in there and mayyyybee see some change in Alec soon for better or worse. Thanks for reading! See you in Chapter 4!


	4. buried treasure

“Jace?” Isabelle asked tenderly, hitting his door in three short swifts. Judging by the amount of door slamming Jace had done upon re-entry to the institute Izzy could only assume the meeting did not go well. 

Simon, her guiding light in this time, had given her a play-by-play of the days events and all signs pointed to a very disgruntled Jace. He didn’t brood like the rest of them, he performed more of an epic, all-encompassing sulk that would last for days, maybe even months if you let him. Alec had always been good about snapping him out of those episodes, but maybe it was worse now that it was Alec-induced. 

“Jace, come on, you know I’ll kick this damn door down.” And she would too. Her new boots---beautiful, high-heeled black things, were practically made for dramatic entrances.

She heard Jace groan from the opposite end. “Iz, no offense, but not now.” He practically shouted. His anger didn’t faze her though, she had grown up with three brothers, making her invincible to any temper tantrum they might throw. 

“Jace, full offense, but right now!” She stomped her foot in an act of defiance. They were far too old to be locking themselves in their rooms and pouting, and Isabelle felt as if, yet again, they were actually regressing with the years. 

A lock clicked, and the door swung open, Jace already turned around and was walking away from Izzy as she entered. His room was the same, looking virtually unlived in and holding the ghost of a shadowhunter who lived here, but there was a stack of wild papers on Jace’s desk that were clearly new. 

“You know big brother, sending yourself to your room without dinner is a little childish.” She sauntered over to the desk, a light hand going to spread the papers out so she could see the writing. It was all written in crisp, clean handwriting that spoke of years of lessons and structure. Alec’s, no doubt, she could recognize it blind. Jace didn't answer, just let Izzy muse to herself in peace.

“Even his notes follow the rules---look at this, not a letter is messed up.” She was speaking more so to fill the silence now, as Jace who sat on his bed with his head in his arms made no indication that he was going to speak ever. For someone as vocal as Jace, this made her more nervous than his somber words. He used to hide it all behind either over-confidence or sheer self-hatred, and now he’d moved on to absolute silence. She’d coax him out of it, getting her brothers to talk was one of her specialties. After all, what were sisters for if not annoying them into discussing things they bottle up?

“You can’t blame yourself, you know that. I know that sounds rich coming from me, but Alec was an adult who made an adult decision. Asmodeus wanted to watch Magnus crumble, so I think he would have chosen Alec regardless of whether you or I spoke up.” Sometimes Isabelle even liked to believe that, but this was not one of those times. She knew she should have answered the call before Alec got a chance to martyr himself, but her selfishness had thought they could barter out---forgetting for a second that Alec always valued his life as lesser. If Jace had made the sacrifice they'd still be at an odds of one half of a whole parabati. It was clearly Isabelle who should have made the sacrifice. 

“We shouldn’t have let him make that choice.” Jace whispered hollowly into his arms, the only sign that his vocal cords even worked at all after the past few days. 

“Do you really think Alec would care what you would and wouldn’t let him do?” She remarked gently, still focused on the writing in front of her. It was so elegant, and so Alec, with winding beautiful cursive that almost sang of calligraphy. This homework was probably the most real thing they’d gotten out of him since Edom. 

Leave it to Alec to give them work in his absence. 

The reflective sheen of something rectangular caught her eye, and next to the papers was some of the few sentimental items Jace possessed. Three pictures, one of Max, at the home in Idris with his nose in a book that made Izzy’s stomach churn with a deep sadness; one of Jace and Clary holding each other’s faces in a way that was both playful and romantic, and lastly one of Jace, Izzy, and Alec sitting in central park and laughing at something the camera person (Clary) had said. Izzy had her arms slung lazily around her two brothers, smiling so big her eyes were mere squints in the summer sun, and Alec had that rare smile that came from those sparse unguarded moments where he allowed himself to be blissfully happy. Jace looked golden, captured perfectly in this moment. 

She remembered the day with clarity, Lying with her head in Alec’s lap, forcing him to tell her the kind of details about his relationship with Magnus that made her brother’s blush visible even with a sunburn. Clary was drawing Jace, and Jace---the horrible model, kept moving around and running his mouth with whatever thought popped into his blonde head at the moment. 

“Do you remember this?” Izzy questioned, the ghost of a smile breezing her features. Jace looked up just enough to rest his sharp chin on his arm, golden eyes analyzing the picture with a raw sense of longing in his features. 

“Perfectly.” He responded, the corners of his mouth quipping up ever so slightly. “That one poor girl had tried to flirt with Alec when we were leaving. I think his entire body turned red for the next twenty minutes.” Isabelle laughed, a real, lightening, free laugh that made her feel as she used to---- whole. 

“I forgot about that.” She whispered bringing the picture back down to look at it better. His blue eyes looked so beautiful as the sun lightened them to an almost transparent color. Where had those happy teenagers run away to? She felt estranged to the people smiling back at her, knowing full well she was one of them. 

“So did he.” Jace whispered, almost inaudibly, the smile dropping from his face just as suddenly as it came. He sighed again, this time pushing up from the bed and grabbing the leather jacket that hung from a hook near his door. “I’m going to see Clary.” He announced, and just like that was gone. 

Isabelle sighed and then gingerly placed the photograph back down, looking once again at the elegant cursive that marked Alec’s handwriting. She used her pointer finger to trace some of the letters, as if she were touching Alec himself. He pushed down too hard on the pen, and in some spots her fingers had turned black with ink. 

There were so many papers, and Isabelle was far too curious for her own good. College had to be an experience, and in some small part of her mind she was actually happy for him to get to be a part of something so normal. Shadowhunters didn’t get normal, but maybe he would. She flipped through a couple of papers, graphs and equations filling her vision until suddenly it happened. 

There, in the margin of one of his boring accounting papers, was a doodle. A black sketch that looked as if he had done it in a day dreaming fashion, but still unmistakably Alec’s hand that drew it. 

It was the angelic rune, shining like a beacon of hope to Isabelle.

The Clave had said they needed evidence to sanction a mission where they could reveal themselves to a mundane, and this----this scribble was just that! He remembered! 

“JACE!” She screamed, knowing full well he had probably already left the institute. She clutched the paper tightly in her fist and sprinted out of Jace’s room, basically flying to the main exit. When she had reached the last corridor, she could see his form, sauntering slowly out to the streets and Izzy used the full volume of her lungs to stop him. 

“JACE!” He turned, wild golden eyes staring at her with surprise at her lack of composure. In this one instance, she didn’t even care that she wasn’t graceful, they had a realistic shot at getting Alec back! Screw composure! 

“What----“ she started, unraveling the paper and all but throwing it in his face to show him her find, “does THIS look like to you?” 

Jace’s slim fingers snatched the paper away, pulling it down to look at it without the stained-glass sunshine pouring through. 

“The angelic rune…” He whispered, a sigh of relief passing his lips before he had captured Izzy in a bone crushing hug. She hugged him back with the same ferocity, their arms wrapped around each other so tightly the paper probably wouldn’t have fit if someone had tried to slip it between them. 

“He drew a rune!” Jace remarked, pulling back, but still holding one arm on Izzy’s. He smiled bright, nothing hesitant like she’d been so used to over the months, but something real and stellar that showed all of his teeth, even the chipped one. 

“We have to tell-----“He looked wild and dazed, his blonde hair pushed back manically, and his mouth forming words his brain could not yet register. “everyone! Where are Maryse and Robert now? And Magnus?” 

“Mom and Dad are in Idris, but they’ll come down for this. Or we’ll go to the council I don’t care, I’ll fly there if I have to!” She responded, ecstasy flowing through her every syllable. She was basically bouncing on the balls of her feet, the institute suddenly brighter than she had ever felt it been before. 

“Call Magnus, I’ll send a fire message to the Clave.” Jace thought aloud. He was about to turn when another ear to ear smile broke across his face. 

“Iz…” He started. All the years had suddenly washed off Jace’s face and for once in the many years she’d known him, Jace actually looked his age. He looked young, and carelessly happy, a look that truly suited him. 

“He’s coming home.” And with that, he was running. Izzy’s fingers had already pulled out her phone and the dial tone ringing for Magnus.  
So this is what hope felt like. How nice. 

 

A/N: this chapter is short I'm sorry!! But yay happiness! There's going to be some plot twists and such coming soon to the next few chapters if all goes as planned with my sporadic writing, but please let me know what you think!! Thanks for reading :)


	5. clave sessions

Idris had always been an incredibly beautiful place. With its winding arches of white and gold, and perpetual summer sun shining down on the city like the rays of heaven, even Clary Fray, who had never lived in Idris could find it homey. 

Unfortunately the circumstances didn’t exactly warrant a picnic. Maybe one day she’d come here for a non-life threatening event, but thus far, she’d say the tally was something like 3-0. Her only comfort was that now Jace was with her. She'd come initially to help her mom and Luke move into a house suitable for multiple day stays whenever Luke had to attend some meeting, but now it seemed she would not be leaving with her parents. Jace, more flustered then she'd ever seen him had come running up to her in the middle of a plaza in Idris and literally swept her off her feet. Being short that's not really a hard thing to do, but the kiss that made her knees weak was, to say the least, expert. "He's coming home!" He'd said in a wildly happy voice, and as if they were connected she knew immediately what that meant. 

Currently Clary sat on one of the hard stone steps that led to the Accords Hall, Isabelle standing behind her with her arms crossed and a vacant expression in her dark eyes, and Jace in front of her, pacing back and forth and biting his lip unconsciously. As soon as the fire message had been sent, and the call to Idris received, the Lightwoods had packed up immediately. Magnus surely would have come too, but Jace said his phone had gone straight to voicemail. He had other things on his plate, Clary was sure, so Izzy had just left him a text message in all caps demanding he come straight to Idris when he could. She was surprised he hadn’t flown in immediately--- all glitter and power, but maybe for once since Edom he was getting a good night’s rest. Or, more likely, was doing something the Clave would deem ‘illegal’ and thus went off the grid for a few hours. It was Magnus Bane, so really you could just pick your favorite story and roll with it.

“What is TAKING them so long?” Isabelle demanded, breaking the silence. She had been so happy when they’d first arrived, that powerful light in her eyes returning in full strength but with the Clave’s many rules and laws it was hard to stay positive on what should have been an easy decision. Even with their father as the Inquisitor, Clary had felt the law had never been harder. 

Jace cracked his knuckles, an impatient tick of his reserved specifically for the Clave, so it seemed. He was shaking his head, stray strands of golden hair flying wildly on his usually composed head. He was always so stressed out nowadays, and Clary had been trying to comfort him in any and every way. She truly thought she’d been making progress too, getting him to stopping blaming himself for everything that happened in the war and since then, but as soon as he’d seen Alec he’d fallen back into his usual black-hole of depression. Clary didn’t have a parabati, and thus could not understand the full gravity of his pain, but she did understand missing Alec. 

Clary could probably count the number of one on one conversations she’d had with Alec in one hand, but even she could feel his absence like the hole it was. They were a team, and on the few missions they’d been on since they’d returned, it was hard not to rely on their archer in the shadows. Isabelle and Jace had gotten hurt on their first run----nothing too bad, but warranting of enough iratze----and Clary had a sneaking suspicion it had everything to do with Alec Lightwood. Both because they were used to the routine of always having back up, and secretly because they were punishing themselves. No matter how many times Clary told them it wasn’t their fault, they were both still spiraling with the passing days. It had strangely fallen upon the two newest members of the shadow world----Simon and Clary---- to get the strongest shadowhunters back on their feet. 

Jace had opened his mouth, no doubt to say something snarky and vaguely self-deprecating, but was cut short by the opening of the Accords doors. Clary stepped forward, but was instantly held back by a soft hand on hers. She looked up at Jace and could see none of his facade anymore, just a young boy who needed someone to believe in him. That someone would always be her. 

"We've got this." She whispered, right as an official spoke to them. 

“The council is in session. You are permitted to enter.” The shadowhunter with caramel skin and a thick British accent announced. The three of them had already made it up the stairs before his sentences had finished, and within seconds Clary’s vision was filled with the Hall of Accords. She was feeling a strong sense of déjà vu considering the last time she was in Idris for a council meeting was for the exact same topic, but hopefully this time would have a better outcome. 

The hall looked significantly less crowded since a good number of shadowhunters had returned to their institutes, but it by no means was empty. Jia Penhallow sat at the center, a sunken looking Robert Lightwood next to her, and a plump surly looking man to her right. Isabelle, Jace, and Clary sat at the three free seats in the front, Jace standing to present their case. 

“Clary Fairchild, Isabelle Lightwood and Jace Herondale, you have come to present new evidence in the case of Alexander Lightwood?” The counsulwoman asked in her crisp professional voice. With her hair down, Clary could see the stark resemblance between the consulwoman and her daughter. The daughter who the clave had also separated from her family. Clary understood ‘the law is hard, but it is the law’ and all that but at some point it came dangerously close to callous. 

“Yes, Consulwoman. It has come to our attention that Alec has drawn an angelic rune, and we believe this to be enough evidence to reveal the shadow realm to him, with the Clave’s permission of course.” Jace spoke in a clear voice. He was really very impressive about spinning his words, considering he'd been complaining about the very same Clave only seconds before. He’d be an accomplished diplomat if he weren’t so good at wielding a seraph blade. 

Robert’s sad eyes looked wide suddenly, his focus remaining on his two children in front of him. She knew that Robert and Alec hadn’t exactly been going on father-son fishing trips before the Dark War, but Clary could see the desperation for this to be true in his mannerisms. Clary couldn’t even picture the pain of losing two children, but there was so much raw emotion on Robert’s usually stoic face that she understood a small portion of it. 

“Do you have the proof?” Robert asked, just as Jace pulled the paper out from his pocket. It was perfectly folded into a small rectangle, and soon Jace had let go of Clary’s hand and passed along the paper to Robert. His fingers traced the angelic rune, a look of longing passing briefly in his eyes. Clearly, Robert didn’t want to dwell to long, so he passed it along to Jia who examined it skeptically. 

“And you’re sure this is his handwriting?” The consulwoman asked, eyes still focused on the white sheet in front of her. 

“Positive. The Inquisitor can attest to this, Alec has a very distinctive handwriting.” Jace responded proudly. 

"We have past work of Alec's for reference, Madame Consulwoman, if needed." Isabelle added. 

“And how exactly did you come into contact with this, considering the ban on direct contact with the Lightwood boy?” The man next to the consulwoman had asked, his eyes narrowed at Jace. Clary knew full well Jace could protect himself, especially against accusations by a diplomat but something about the threatening manner about this guy made Clary want to kick his ass for even berating Jace in such a sensitive time. Who cares how they got it, they did, and now they could get Alec back. Simple. 

Jia looked down at the papers in front of her, an expression of discomfort on her face. The Penhallows and the Lightwoods were cousins, Robert the Inquisitor, and Alec a war hero, thus presenting a unified front on accepting Jace’s proposition, but now with the direct question out there it had to be addressed. No good deed goes unpunished. 

“Yes,” Jia said, still not looking up, “how exactly did this fall into your possession, Jace?” 

Isabelle stood up then, her boots clacking on the stone floor like the crack of a whip. 

“Who cares how this was found, it was anyway! Alec is a shadowhunter, through and through. He fought in both wars, hit the knife out of the hand of Endarkened without scratching the Inquisitor, and sacrificed himself in a demon realm to save the rest of us! I’ve never heard of a mundane doing any of that. Not to mention he has a parabati----” she motioned to Jace who’s eyes dropped at the mention of parabati, no doubt thinking about the rune that no longer worked. “And it is one of the most dishonorable things to separate parabati. Or to abandon one of our own when he needs us most.” She crossed her arms defiantly, purposefully looking away from her father. Jace had just continued to stare down, his golden eyes hard set and void of any emotion. Maybe just maybe they could let this go, and just proceed with what they had now--- wasn’t it technically better they had interfered considering Alec was drawing runes in his spare time?

"Alexander is not technically a shadowhunter anymore." The official responded.

"He's not technically a mundane either."

“That still doesn’t explain why you felt the need to disobey the direct orders of the Clave---Alec Lightwood has been deemed a mundane in all aspects since his return from Edom, his parabati bond with Jace Herondale broken. You cannot just give us a scrap of paper and claim him to have been cured from something given by not only a demon, but a prince of hell. It must be dealt-----“

“Enough.” The consulwoman thundered, rending the babbling of the short man useless. Objectively he brought up some good points, but this was Alec Lightwood they were talking about. Since the day Clary met him he had been the most Clave-obedient member of the New York Institute, and now they were addressing his case like he was a delinquent. 

“Waybrown has a point, we cannot simply overlook your insubordination.” Jia sounded exhausted, but still as powerful as ever. Her dark eyes had risen to inspect their small group. Jace had clenched his fist next to Clary, the only sign that this trial was slowly killing him just as the first one had. Clary reached out, her own hand catching his until his palms opened up and their fingers laced together. She could feel the tension running through his veins and just wished upon anyone that would listen that she could help in some way other than hand holding. 

“However, we also cannot pretend to have not received new information.” She looked briefly at Waybrown then, daring him to refute her, and then pointedly at Robert Lightwood who seemed to be having an internal war between his professional side and rarely shown emotional side. He’d yet to speak up, but Clary assumed that others would protest he had too close of an interest in this particular case to be objective. 

“We will allow further investigation in the case of Alexander Lightwood.” Jace sighed, a breath that seemed to course through his entire body. His shoulders had dropped with something light, his right hand squeezing Clary’s tightly but not uncomfortably. There had been short whispering going through the crowd, Robert was looking like he was suppressing something of a smile, and Isabelle had let out an excited squeal until Jia held up one bony hand to silence the crowd. 

“But in light of how this information came to us, and for the state of our laws on mundanes----if nothing new surfaces within the week, meaning he does not remember or show any further signs of understanding the shadow world, then you and your sister will be relocated away from the New York Institute and Alexander. Forbade strictly from any forms of contact with him indefinitely. From what we know now Alec is a mundane, and our law strictly prohibits this kind of interaction. We need more than a drawing of something he may have seen in an ancient book. A week is all I can give you, Isabelle and Jace Lightwood.” The consulwoman finished, pressing her lips together in a firm line. 

‘Forbade from any contact indefinitely’ didn't sound as good as 'further investigation' but Clary assumed she couldn't pick her favorite. 

'Indefinitely' would mean Jace and Isabelle wouldn’t even get the chance to check up on their brother, or form a mundane relationship, or even see him in passing on the streets of New York. They wouldn’t get to know about his life, and he wouldn’t learn that he even had siblings, or people who loved him unconditionally. Like a restraining order, but somehow even more limiting considering they’d be forcibly relocated. New York was their home, more so than Idris, or any other place they’d stayed. Taking the Lightwoods out of New York would be the fall of the same city, and without a second thought Clary knew she'd follow them wherever they were to go. 

Clary had opened her mouth, about to push up from her seat when Jace squeezed her hand tighter, golden eyes meeting her own. He looked as he had as of recently--- still stunningly beautiful, but now like a Picasso painting where you could really see where the world had drained him in the saddest ways possible. He gave her a small shake of his head to rely his thoughts, which she had somehow learned to read perfectly. He knew this wasn’t ideal, that the stakes were far too high to be comfortable, but that this was Alec. And he’d give up everything he had for just a single shot at bringing him back. 

“We understand.” Jace responded, looking back at the consul. He looked once at Izzy, and she gave him a reassuring smile that held some of the trepidation they all felt.  
“Thank you for your time.” Jace added, giving a curt nod to Robert on his way out. Jace was still holding Clary’s hand tightly as they ushered out, and Clary brought her free hand to rest on top of his, cradling his palm softly. 

They had one week to make Alec, Alec again. A week after the months they’d spent trying in futile attempts, only this time the stakes were raised. 

"What now?" Isabelle asked when they were outside. The sun was setting and casting an ominous glow on a usually serene scene, almost reflecting their feelings. A week. A week or they'd be relocated and cut off entirely from Alec. A week, when in months they'd barely gotten a scrap of paper.

"Now is when we fight hardest, right?" Clary said, stopping in her tracks to face the two siblings. No, they would not be sulking tonight----they'd be celebrating! And strategizing. There were plenty of ways to turn a mundane into a shadowhunter, surely one of them would work. "Alec would do that for us, just think! What could bring back his memories AND make him a shadowhunter?" 

Isabelle and Jace turned to each other almost at the same moment, a strange look glinting in their eyes as if they were real, blood siblings. They had an idea! But then again, a lot of their collective ideas were excessively illegal, so maybe it was more like 'uh oh.... they had an idea.'

"Do you think it'll work, Iz?" Jace asked cryptically.

Isabelle just nodded confidently, walking towards where they had portaled in from. "Oh it'll work. We're just going to need all the help we can get...." 

 

A/N: sorry for the delay!!! I got horribly sick the past two days but I'm feeling better now! So here is ch.5, I hope you /somewhat/ enjoy it, but of course I had to angst things up a little bit!! I wanna hear from you tho! Would you like to see Alec go to the shadowhunter academy for a year, or less (since he needs less training then Simon did) OR I had an idea where I'd get him to join the squad on a hunt for the (holy grail) mortal cup since I could say it got 'lost' in the Dark War. I havent decided yet but let me know what you think of the chapter and possible plot points to come! Thanks angels! EDIT: So if you're new to this story I am re-vamping a lot so this is where things start to defer from my original updates! Sorry for the confusion and I hope you enjoy!


	6. second first dates

Alec Lightwood had never been so nervous for a date. Sure he hadn't really had a whole lot of dates but the zoo that had just erupted in his stomach could not be normal. 

What did people even talk about on dates anymore? Alec highly doubted anyone wanted to hear the boring business facts he’d learned at NYU, or the profound if not impressively creative curse words his roommate concocted while playing one of their many video games. And Alec was somewhat atrocious at talking about real human emotions so he’d what…. Talk about the weather? The fact that bees are dying at an alarming rate? What exactly constituted as charming small talk?

He shrugged off the second of his clothing choices, picking up his last option and deciding by default he would wear that one. For once in his life, Alec was actually regretting only owning like three sweaters, but at least this one had the least amount of holes. He’d consider that classy enough for the night.

He gave one sparring look at the mirror in front of him, shrugged, and grabbed his keys. The man he was meeting was so impossibly handsome that Alec could have worn his best suit and tux and still not have held a candle to this man. So he was just going to wing it, and roll with the good luck that had been placed upon him. Maybe this guy had a thing for guys with terrible fashion choices, and if that was the case then Alec considered himself to be a goldmine. 

The place they were meeting was Felicitious, one of Alec’s favorite places, and clearly one of the guy’s as well, seeing as how he was there so frequently. He’d either be reading or writing something in a black book, probably poetry or the kind of exquisite writing that would one day find itself into the New York Times. He had always looked like the accomplished type, the kind way out of Alec’s league. So he spent his entire subway ride to central city fidgeting with his sleeves in nervous anticipation. Would this guy really even show up? What if he was just joking, and Alec would spend the night waiting and wondering? What if he had meant it in the friend way and Alec had just read way too out of context? 

When he reached the door of Felicitious he had half a mind to turn around. If he didn't see his 'date' immediately he'd do just that and maybe work on his Finance homework or something. He wouldn't make this night a total waste if this all turned out to be a ruse.

Luckily, another defining feature of Alec’s date for the night was his ability to always stick out. His blue dip-dyed ends sticking up heads above most of the crowd. 

“Magnus!” Alec called a little too excitedly. He made a mental note not to freak the guy out on their first date, and to play it cool. He could do cool right? 

Apparently Magnus didn’t seem to notice, or maybe it was care because he smiled brightly at Alec, his eyes shining with something Alec couldn’t quite place, and his mouth forming Alec’s name in an all too pleasing manner. So he'd showed up! Alec considered that a win in the first-date category. 

“Alexander! I got you a coffee, I hope that’s alright.” He said, pointing one of his ringed fingers to the mug in front of him. 

“Yeah that’s----thank you. Sorry, were you waiting long?” Alec sat down, shrugging his jacket off, and taking a sip of coffee. Black. Just how he liked it. Was it possible this guy was both handsome and a mind reader?

“Not at all. I quite like this place, I don’t mind sitting in here. Not that your presence doesn’t make it exponentially better.” His velvety voice seemed to carry on, making the blood beneath Alec’s cheeks rise at the compliment. This man had a way with words that it almost seemed the two were secretly working together to flatter Alec in the best and worst ways possible. Honestly he was feeling betrayed by his own skin for giving away his emotions so easily---- wasn’t there something to be said about playing hard to get? Although maybe hard to get wasn't the right approach, considering they'd barely spoken three words to each other---two of which Alec stuttered on before he'd said yes to a date. He still couldn't believe Magnus had asked him out after that confusing 'study group', so he jumped at the opportunity blindly. Perhaps too blindly considering he didn't even really know Magnus at all, save for a name and his two friends Jace and Stanley (if that was his name).

“I uh----I have noticed you in here a few times actually. Do you go to NYU?” Way to lead Alec, start with a stalker-y question to completely freak him. You should star in dating reality TV shows, really. 

Magnus seemed unfazed however. “No, I actually only came with Jace to your dorm for some pointers. I run my own business, accounting is of course, necessary. But I’d like to hear about you. Where are you from, Alexander?” Magnus saying his name really did something to Alec, something he shouldn’t be feeling on a first date. But the scene just felt so familiar. The names, the faces, everything seemed like he’d been looking at a two-way mirror from the wrong side. He shook the thought, not wanting to seem like he was blowing off Magnus’ question. Where was he from again? 

“The East End. My parents were lawyers.” He responded hastily, unsure whether or not this was proper date etiquette to talk about his dead parents. 

Just then Magnus’ phone rang and Alec’s heart sank. He’d probably told one of his friends to call him in twenty minutes to save him from a horrible date, and right now he’d have to go deal with some ‘emergency’ that would leave Alec behind. Well, it had been nice while it lasted. Bittersweet but nice. 

“Ah, sorry about that,” Magnus had taken out his phone, but he hadn’t even looked at it. Just held the power button until his phone had shut off. His green-gold eyes redirecting back to Alec with such a gaze that Alec felt as if they’d known each other for years. And something in Alec's chest said that he'd like familiarizing himself with Magnus for as long as it took.

“You can take it---if you want to.” Alec added earnestly. He didn’t want to stop an important phone call, or even a date-dash plot if that was what Magnus truly wanted. Alec was an adult, he could deal with rejection. What he couldn't deal was holding people back.

“No, it’s just work, probably. Besides I’d much rather hear about you.” And Magnus looked like he truly meant it, probably the one course Alec had not been prepared for tonight was genuine interest. How was it that someone so enchanting as Magnus was looking at Alec as if he were the prize? 

“Well, there’s uh--- not much. I’m an only child.” Magnus nodded at that, but Alec could tell he was thinking of something else, far off. “I go to NYU, major in Accounting, nothing incredibly interesting…” He trailed off, taking a sip of his coffee to help stop his rambling and pathetically nervous jittering. “I’m sorry, I haven’t even asked about you, you said you own your own business?”

Magnus just waved his hand, smiling silently at a joke unspoken. “I consider myself a freelancer, terribly tedious stuff.” Alec got the sneaking suspicion that nothing Magnus did was tedious. Not when he did it with bedazzled jeans, and spiky hair. 

“Anyway, when did you start at NYU? I don’t recall seeing you here before, you have a face I doubt I would forget.” And Alec was blushing again. At this rate he’d just be better off getting a red spray tan---save his embarrassment for something less obvious. 

For some reason, he was blanking. When did he start at NYU? It was… last fall? Last spring? He had applied in…. “Um…” Alec started, his eyebrows knitting together while he focused on shifting through his memory. It had to be last year, right? “Last year, I think. I just moved in with my roommate this year though, and he showed me this place.” Alec responded, satisfied with himself. Yes, it had to be last year, it was coming back to him now. Vaguely. He and Garrett had only moved in together this semester, but it had been an easy transition and thus, felt like he had lived there forever. 

“But I like it New York has always felt like home to me. Where are you from?” 

 

Eventually the conversation wandered off, and suddenly Magnus was laughing easier--- his smile wide and bright, and they were discussing everything and anything that came to mind. Alec, who was usually more of the participate-from-a-distance type, found it incredibly easy to get lost in conversation with Magnus. He didn’t feel awkward, or like he had to watch his words when he was around him, just that he could speak freely and Magnus would listen. 

Distantly Alec was aware of the time, but that didn’t really matter when Magnus had that timeless voice that could captivate him for years. 

Unfortunately the operating hours of Felicitious didn’t seem to care about their engaging conversation, and soon the shop was closing down around them. 

“Where do you live?” Alec asked, once they had made it outside. New York still held the remnants of a cold winter, despite the fact that they were well on their way to spring, and Magnus’ own cheeks had gotten rosy from the brisk air. It was a beautiful tint to his tan skin, and Alec wanted nothing more than to run his fingers over his cheeks. He didn’t, but the temptation was definitely there. 

Magnus mentioned an apartment and Alec felt somewhat surprised he would come all the way down here for a coffee date with a stranger. That coffee shop must sell some damn good espresso’s. 

“Well I’ll---uh, walk you there. If you want?” Alec smiled at the thought of just prolonging his time with Magnus. It had been the best hours in what felt like forever, and he was much to selfish to give it up easily. Magnus’ eyes filled with that same look Alec couldn’t place---like both happiness and sadness and longing in one, which clearly meant Alec was reading the situation wrong considering they hadn’t known each other long enough to experience any of those emotions. Magnus was an enigma, Alec could recognize that, but the looks he was giving him was so much more. 

“I’d very much enjoy that, Alexander.” And with that Magnus took his hand, leading the way down the street. In truth, Alec had never been more upset at the invention of gloves, the thick cotton the only thing between him and Magnus’ bare skin. They walked in silence for some time, but not the uncomfortable kind that usually settled between people like a weight, but the kind that came from just appreciating the moment. They didn’t talk because they didn’t feel the need to. There was something about this, about Magnus that felt universally right. 

They were approaching an apartment complex that Alec was getting what felt like flashbacks of. He’d been here before, late at night, once, he could remember waiting outside for… 

and the memory was gone. He must have just been feeling some kind of displaced déjà vu, probably from a lack of sleep. While he'd enjoyed the flashes of those strangers briefly, he was also incredibly unsettled by them. They seemed sad, more than sad----in peril. And dream Alec couldn't do anything to save them. So Real Alec had decided to take a quick break from sleeping, which usually resulted in him falling asleep at midnight and waking up at four. Plenty of time for rest, right? 

“We’re here.” Magnus said somewhat bitterly, as if the thought that they’d reached their destination had saddened him. And Alec could definitely understand that concept. 

“Oh.” He said, looking up to get a full view of the place. It was big, and nothing like Alec’s dingy dorm. It was the kind of place someone who had their life together would own. “This place is nice.” Alec added as an after-thought. Maybe he’d look into freelancing too, if it could get you a place like this. 

“I like it, it’s quite magical… in it’s own ways.” And Alec couldn’t help but think it was Magnus that made everything magical. His green eyes had caught Alec’s yet again. With the way their breaths seemed to mingle in the limited space between them, Alec was acutely aware of how close they were. At this distance he could see the gold in Magnus’ eyes, small little flecks that surrounded his iris’ and made a color all his own. Just below that was his nose, and then his lips, looking so cold. He could just reach out and…

“Thank you for walking me home, Alexander.” Magnus said in that silky voice, smiling that devilishly handsome smirk again and turning ever so slightly to leave. In that moment, Alec acted on instinct, holding Magnus’ arm to stop him from moving too far, and closing the space between them in a short motion. Magnus seemed surprised, but easily met Alec’s kiss with enthusiasm, their lips moving in such an expert way that Alec had to wonder whether they’d practiced before. The cold did nothing to deter either of them, and Alec’s hands had found a way to cup Magnus’ face in the gentlest of fashions while their lips did the work. 

His hands had just moved to the back of Magnus’ neck, as Magnus had found Alec’s waist when they heard something. In all honesty, Alec would have been content to ignore any and all intrusions, including but not limited to, the apocalypse--- but it was clear the voice was relentless in grabbing their attention. 

“Magnus!” It was Jace. Looking haggard, and like he’d been running, with a wild but amused expression on his face. Behind him stood two girls, the first, short and redhead, and the other the dark-haired girl from the previous day. She looked just as she had then, powerfully beautiful, but with the knowledge and ability to kick someone’s ass. He knew in some deep corner of his mind he should be somewhat intimidated by this woman but she was looking at Alec with a small smile on her crimson lips. 

“Are you serious? We’ve been calling you for hours!” Jace was stifling something of a laugh as he yelled, making his anger come off as less intense than Jace probably intended. His eyes moving back and forth between the two, lingering for just a second to long on Alec’s breathless features.

Alec blushed something deep that extended all the way to his neck, and immediately he was aware of how little personal space there was between he and Magnus. He stepped away, looking down at his feet and hoping Magnus’ roommate wouldn’t hate Alec for making out with his friend in the middle of the night. Would he consider the excuse that it was cold?

“In case you haven’t noticed, I am a bit occupied at the moment!” Magnus retorted incredulously, looking as if he could have punched Jace in the face then and there. The raven-haired girl giggled, allotting Magnus to shoot her a sour look, and Alec knew he was completely out of place in what was so clearly an intimate argument. Maybe they had some unspoken friend rule about kissing strangers in front of their apartment at midnight. 

"More than a bit it would seem..."

"Shut it, Isabelle." 

“I should go… Magnus, I’m sorry. I----“

“No, wait, Alec. This actually involves you. Magnus would know that if he picked up his damn phone every once in a couple of hours.” Jace remarked, cutting Alec off, and throwing him wildly off his mark. How could this involve him? Did Jace have an accounting question that urgently needed solving? Was he about to berate Magnus about his choice in men and needed Alec as physical evidence? Either way, Alec would very much like to go home now. Maybe fantasize about where that kiss could have taken them had they not been interrupted... 

“How does this involve Alec?” Magnus inquired thoughtfully. 

“We better head inside.” Jace answered, looking around as if he were skeptical of the very ground they stood on. The moon was casting an silvery glow on his blonde head--- almost making it reflective. He might’ve looked heroic, and Alec might have appreciated that if he hadn’t just broken his kiss with Magnus with vague reasoning. 

“This might take a while.” 

 

A/N: Is Magnus forgiven for missing Idris? :-))))) Thank you for all the votes but I'd still like to hear more! Either Alec goes to the Academy and the squad does that squad thing of 'guest speaker-ing' OR they convince Alec to go on their hunt for the mortal cup with them! So far I think it's 0-5 mortal cup, but let me know your opinion! Also any POVs you'd like to see/character cameos/etc. I'd love to hear from you! Thanks angels, see you in chapter 7!


	7. You're a shadowhunter, Alec

Isabelle couldn’t remember the last time she’d been to Magnus’ apartment when it had been this clean. The entire apartment had a very futurist look of white walls and black furniture, but what truly stood out to Isabelle was the lack of excess mess littering his floors. Maybe that one time Jace was actually his roommate Magnus had a somewhat decent apartment, but that had lasted until the exact moment Jace left, where Isabelle suspected Magnus ransacked the room on purpose as a means of protest. 

Now however, it was actually livable, something she would have questioned if she hadn’t put two and two together and figured out where the warlock had been while dodging calls. 

“Now, Jace, Isabelle--- Biscuit, not that I don’t enjoy your presence, but what seemed so urgent that you had to go ahead and interrupt a perfectly good date?” Magnus had walked to the center of his room, sitting on the arm of one of his sleek black couches. Alec had followed him in just enough to stay at the threshold, a small smile dancing on his lips as Magnus finished his sentence with ‘a perfectly good date’. There was something so adorable about her brother being smitten and all that, but now was definitely not the time to dwell. He still seemed to be uncomfortable with having been invited in by what he must have thought were Magnus’ crazy friends. 

Jace rolled his eyes at the scene, but there was something unmistakably happy in his movements. He spoke up then to answer Magnus. “We went to see the Clave, which you would have known---“ 

“Had I checked my phone, yes I’ve gathered that.” Magnus was really not feeling the theatrics today. His eyes just kept darting back to Alec, as if afraid he’d leave at any moment. 

Isabelle pulled the paper out from her pocket, holding it out for Magnus to see. Alec was leaning against the wall on the far side, but his neck had stretched far so he could strain to see what was mysteriously being passed around. He must have given up though as his shoulder’s shrugged down and he purposefully looked towards the door. 

“Tell me who’s handwriting that is, and what that is in the margin.” Izzy started, watching as recognition flashed over Magnus’ angular features. 

“Oh.” He said softly, watching the paper as if it were alive and possibly the most precious thing he’d handled. She could see the thoughts dancing around in his head just as Jace and Isabelle had come to the same conclusion. Alec was in there, he just needed some help getting out of his own mind. And honestly, what else is new?

“And you’ve showed this to the Clave?” Magnus’ eyes hovered around the three of the shadowhunters, power basically thrumming beneath his skin with excitement. 

“Yes! And that is why we’ve ruined your date, we only have a week to show he remembers something more than a rune.” Clary replied, her lips closing together in a firm line. A week wasn’t much, but it was something. More than they had before, at the very least. 

“Also, seriously Magnus? You couldn’t have waited like a week to start Frenching my brother?” Maybe once they were trying to convince him of the life he once lived, perhaps? Go all old-school Cinderella and break the spell? Or, something like that. Isabelle had only seen one of those Disney movies before stopping it halfway deciding to watch the second ‘Lord of the Rings’ with Simon a third time. 

“No day like today, my dear Isabelle.” He smiled at that, and Isabelle couldn’t help but let something of a laugh escape her. Raziel, she hadn't felt this good in what felt like years... 

“Hold up-----your brother?” A gruff voice from the fringe of their group asked. Alec was standing with his arms crossed, leaning against the white wall of Magnus’ apartment. His wide blue eyes were quizzical, watching Isabelle as if analyzing her. She could basically see his train of thought. The way their raven-black hair moved in the same waves, just different lengths. The way their dark eyebrows accented their pale skin, the bridge of their noses, somewhat angular cheekbones, and the numerous other similarities found just by looking at the pair. She smiled at him then as if to say ‘isn’t it obvious?’ 

“I’m also your brother!” Jace said, waving as if introducing himself, and altogether breaking the moment. He held that familiar lax-Jace attitude that had so often infuriated Alec, but now only confused him further. Surely for all the similarities he could see between Isabelle and himself, he could only see differences with Jace. “Adopted, but just thought you should know.” 

"I...I have to go, I have class in the morning and----" Alec made a move to leave but Isabelle was faster, grabbing on his forearm gently to stop him.

"Wait, please just let us explain. Give us half an hour, and if you still think we're crazy you can leave." Her heart dropped at the idea of Alec walking out on them after everything. He mused this other, looked at the door once more longingly and then gave in, still positioned as close to an escape as possible. 

“Any other mysterious family members I should know about?” At least his sass had translated to his mundane self. 

“Well there was that time Jace and Clary thought they were siblings, but no worries, I’m your only sister.” Isabelle responded, ignoring the annoyed glares from Jace and Clary behind her. The Lightwoods did have a lot of cousins, but that was a story for another time. 

Alec’s mouth was moving with unspoken words, his eyes darting around the room as if looking for answers in the nooks and crannies of Magnus’ apartment. His eyes honed in on Magnus, still holding the angelic rune Alec had drawn. “And why do you have my notes? If this is some prank, then---“

“It’s not a prank. Listen, Alec, I know it’s a lot to take in. Think---and I mean really think. Look past the blocks in your mind, doesn’t anything seem familiar here? Look at what you drew on your notes, that right there is a rune. Just like the ones Izzy, Clary and I have on our bodies.” He lifted his shirt then to prove his point, the angelic rune and all the others that littered Jace’s body seeming to shine at being addressed. 

“That---that was a doodle. I---I saw it once, and I was just tracing and…” He was shaking his head, his eyes never having met his siblings’. He had barely looked up at their runes, as if even seeing them now he couldn’t believe them. “This is crazy! I'm an only child, I've wanted siblings my whole life, don't you think I'd remember having two of them?” 

“And we want you to, too, big bro. That rune on my chest? That’s a parabati bond, meaning we were connected at one point until shit hit the metaphorical fan and you lost all your memories thus landing us here,” he gestured largely with his hands, as if meaning literally here, in Magnus’ apartment. “We hunt demons, save the mundane world, all that stuff. You’ve fought in two wars, been to a hell dimension and back, done all of this stuff I can never even begin to do justice by telling you about without you trying to meet us halfway.” He continued on with the details about the shadow realm--- vampires, werewolves, warlocks, all that. Magnus let a small puft of blue magic rise, and Alec’s eyebrows went so far up his forehead in surprise they disappeared in his hairline. He didn’t back up, just seemed genuinely intrigued. They talked about their hunts, and the duty of a shadowhunter, and what the runes meant for a few minutes afterward. Clary was surprisingly helpful throughout the whole ordeal, talking about things in 'mundane' terms that Alec actually understood better. He didn't seem like he trusted them still, but in small brief moments it did seem like he believed them.

Eventually Jace let out a breath, to signify the end to his soliloquy, and also probably his exhaustion. Jace had never been one to show a lot of emotions, but Alec was really dragging him along for the ride with this one. 

“What Jace is trying to say, poorly---might I add, is that you’ve forgotten a lot of stuff and we want to help you remember. If you’ll let us. Jace and I, we’re your siblings and we love you very much, Clary and Simon are some of your closest friends, and Magnus well, I’m sure you’ve gathered enough about that if he was willing to go all mundane-style for date night. We just----we might have an idea on how to bring your memories back. If you’re willing to take that chance with us.” She tried to sound as impasse as she could with her words, but she knew her eyes were pleading. She could feel the harsh prick of tears start to force their way into her eyes and all she could think of was how much she hated crying. They sounded crazy, and hell even Isabelle who HAD all her memories would never believe them. Maybe she’d been stupid to think they had a chance. He was happy in his life, with college, and his normal friends. Maybe it had just come to the point where she needed him more than he needed her. She bowed her head to save herself from the embarrassment of crying publicly. 

Within a few seconds, a large calloused hand had come to grab her own, squeezing tight enough for her to squeeze back unconsciously. She didn’t even have to look to know who it was. 

“I----“ He started, but stopped just as suddenly. From years of watching her brother she knew this was just him struggling to find the right words, and if what he was going to say next was ‘have to go home’, or ‘I don’t believe you’ then Isabelle wasn’t exactly sure what she’d do next. Their whole plan had revolved around proving to the Clave Alec wanted to come back to them, without ever questioning whether he really did or not. 

“I remember some things. Not--- like full memories or anything, but pieces, very broken pieces. I've been having weird dreams, mostly focusing on things I don't understand. Like a small army man toy that I know I never had with the memories I should associate with real, or like those markings you have, I KNOW I’ve seen them before…” He trailed off, still with his hand cradling Izzy’s. She placed her free hand on his, feeling her heart sore with raw emotion. He believed them, if at the very least vaguely. He remembered Max’s army man, which meant he was so very close to remembering Max himself. He was so close to them…

“----And I know I’ve seen all your faces before I just, couldn’t tell you where we first met. When I hear your names, I feel things I shouldn’t feel if we had just met. Like I know I’m proud of Isabelle… but I couldn’t tell you why. Or that I worry when I hear Jace’s name, but I know I shouldn’t be afraid for a stranger. It’s the most frustrating thing, because I know what you’re saying shouldn’t make sense, but it does. It does.” He repeated the last words to himself almost silently, looking up at them now with those blue eyes Isabelle could swear held the universe. Jace let out something between a laugh and a sigh of relief and clapped his hand on Alec’s shoulder. 

“That’s the Alec we know! Although I am a bit hurt Izzy gets ‘proud of’ and I get ‘worry about’, but I’ll let it slide this once.” And he plopped himself next to Alec on the couch, letting his arm wrap around his brother’s shoulders. It was such a beautiful sight that Isabelle could cry and not even feel weird about it. Alec believed them, he believed them and together they could convince the Clave! 

“Jace, if we’re looking to get Alec back, I think that description is a step in the right direction.” Clary joked, meeting Jace on the couch and shrugging when he gave her a mock-surprised look. Who didn’t worry for Jace’s health and wellbeing on a daily basis? The kid was like a walking target for trouble. 

“The only thing you need to worry about is how amazing I am.” Jace said, all modesty probably wasted on their trip to the Idris. Izzy would have been annoyed if she didn’t register how close they were to getting things back to normal. 

“Eventually, you learn to ignore him.” Magnus added, breaking his uncharacteristic silence. He was still sitting on the edge of his couch, his long legs stretched in front of him in what she supposed was meant to look lazy but looked all too put together for who she knew Magnus to be around Alec. Where was the heart felt ‘I love you’s’ and making out, and such. Alec seemed just as curious, because his hand slipped out of Isabelle’s as he had turned to look at Magnus in full now. 

“And what are we in this? And please don’t say siblings…” Alec asked, much to the amusement of Isabelle. If their plan worked, and Alec really could come back to them, she couldn’t wait to taunt him for the rest of his shadowhunter life with asking whether Magnus was his sibling. Were Isabelle and Simon the only pair to not have a lineage scare?  
“Do you kiss all your family members like that?” Magnus asked lightly, his eyebrow quipping up in questioning. 

“I didn’t know I had any living relatives until today, so that is still undetermined until you answer.” Alec replied back, smiling softly at his own joke. 

“No.” Magnus answered, “we are not siblings.” She also noticed how he didn’t say they were together either. Probably because in his mind, they had still been broken up in Edom, and now with Alec in front of him slowly resurfacing, he wasn’t sure whether Alec wanted them together again. As if their little doorstep make-out sesh didn’t answer that question. Considering they had more pressing matters at hand than relationships, she'd save the 'ge your romantic shit together' speech for another day. 

“Were we… together in this past-Alec’s life?” He asked, nothing but mere curiosity in his features. (and maybe a little excitement). 

“Yes.” Magnus said, pointedly not elaborating. Alec seemed satisfied nonetheless. 

“Alright, so… now what? Am I supposed to be off cutting the heads of demons I didn’t know existed until today?” Alec asked Izzy. 

“Well you never really chopped heads off, your thing was always a bow and arrow.” She mused, earning a flicker of surprise in Alec’s mystical blue eyes. “And now we go on convincing the Clave you remember, at least vaguely, what the shadow world is. And after that… we have a plan we think might work to bring back your memories.” She looked at Jace worriedly. Their plan was based on a whole lot of ‘if’s’ but IF it worked out perfectly, then Alec would be Alec again. Simple, right?

“We do?” Magnus asked, probably thinking back to how Jace had bit his head off the last time he’d devised a plan. They hadn’t exactly approached Magnus with this idea yet, and had yet to work out the kinks, so technically they had like half of a plan. 

“We do.” Isabelle nodded, meeting Magnus’ direct eye-line. Maybe if she faked confidence in her ‘plan’, no one would go against her. In her defense, this approach worked in the past. 

“We’re going to find the mortal cup.” 

 

A/N: Surprise! The mortal cup won out! (no surprise it was a landslide win) But first off thank you to everyone who voted/ left comments you are the bomb diggity!!! And now Alec knows about the shadow world so lets get this party started. My sickness came back (with a vengeance) and exam week is coming up so updates might be a little less consistent then they have been, but I'll try my best! Let me know your thoughts/questions/etc. and thank you for reading!! :) 


	8. on your mark, get set, hunt!

"My dear Isabelle, the cup is labeled as 'missing' for a reason. That reason being it is missing, as in gone----my magic could not even detect it. How do you propose we find what may not even still be working?" Magnus asked with disbelief. The Mortal Cup. The Lightwoods (minus his favorite) wanted to get the bloody Mortal Cup. 

Getting Alec to remember wasn't impossible, they had a rune that proved he was already slipping through the cracks, but finding the mortal cup when the entire shadow world was searching for it? Even Isabelle and Jace couldn't be that thick-headed, right? 

Wrong.

"I say we retrace the steps. There's been talk about it being right under our noses, and the last time I'd heard it surfaced was Idris." Isabelle spoke with a confidence that radiated, but for once Magnus found himself not drinking the shadowhunter kool-aid. He'd been through two wars with these people, but finding the Holy Grail was a tall order. The council had sent search party after search party for this cup, and Magnus himself had tried tracking it in hopes they might use it on his Alexander. Nothing, not even a whiff of it still being a thing appeared, and if Magnus couldn't track it he'd assume it was all but destroyed. There had been too much bloodshed over the mortal instruments, if the Clave had any sense at all they'd destroy every last instrument they could before they lost more to a Morgernstern-impersonator. But then again, 'Clave' and 'sense' had never really fit properly in the same sentence.

"Say we go to Idris, do you think the Clave is going to say 'Alexander! Welcome back, of course we'll sanction you for a mission even though you've forgotten your training, here's a bow and arrow!' and we'll be off on our merry way? They'll want to test Alec, see if we were the ones who gave him the memories he's claiming to know, and maybe after a few months of training, they'll let him join us. Maybe." Magnus was very familiar with strict Clave law, and if there was a legally professional way to keep the eldest Lightwood from a shady downworlder such as Magnus, the Clave would take it. Hell, Robert Lightwood might even campaign for it. No, if they go to Idris now, Alec will no longer be there's to help. And Magnus highly distrusted the Clave with something as precious as the bue-eyed shadowhunter. 

"What if we didn't tell the Clave?" Jace had spoken up this time, his golden eyes calculating a problem the rest of them could not see. Isabelle's eyebrows had shot up with an unasked question, and even Clary had sucked in a breath. Jace had never been one to play by the rules but even he had to know the Clave could not pardon this. Not even for war heroes. They'd surely be deruned if they whisked away a 'mundane' to find the mortal cup with no direct orders. Their skin would look as ghastly and unnatural as Alec's did now with no rune's.

"Think about it. The Clave gave us a week to show Alec remembers something, so what if we take the week to go hunting for the mortal cup? No officials will be breathing down our necks because the Clave will assume we're here--- working on Alec, and Alec can come with us and maybe even remember a few things, so if this does go wrong, and we don't find it by the end of the week we can still present the Clave with Alec's progress. It's a win-win, really." Jace said, shrugging his shoulders as if agreement to his proposition was obvious. That was just who Jace was as a person though, wholly self-righteous. A Herondale complex, as Magnus had come to note. At times, Magnus could really see the Will Herondale in this boy.

"Jace, walking into Idris uninvited is kind of a tall order. Even with my runes it's hard to get past those walls, and you couldn't even walk the sidewalk without being asked for an autograph. You don't exactly blend in..." Clary countered worriedly. 

"Especially when we're together, the red hair is kind of a give away." Jace responded, looking to his moving fingers as he thought. "We'll go to the outskirts. The mansions---Wayland, Fairchild, the Morgensten rubble, those might have clues. No one goes to the countryside unless they live there, and no one lives there." Jace added thoughtfully, driving his point home. Izzy nodded, a soft 'okay' passing her lips to signify her agreement. Clary was nodding along, nand Alec just stood there with his hands behind his back, looking lost but not denying the plan. Magnus could tell he was outnumbered, and honestly? They'd done a lot less, with a lot more riding on it. This was a true and earnest shot at getting Alec's memories back, and wouldn't Magnus give everything for that chance? 

"Okay." He agreed, the wards coming to mind as he started on their plans. "I know where we can sleep in Idris for the night." 

xx.

 

Magnus had just spent the later parts of the evening on the fringes of Ragnor's old living room. As Alec slowly resurfaced, the shadowhunters (and Simon, who had arrived at Isabelle's call and portaled over with his usual squad), had formed something of a sharing circle, with Clary and Jace gross-coupling on the floor, Izzy and Simon on the couch, and Alec---looking nervous and vaguely overwhelmed, on the ottoman. Isabelle had dove right in to the charming childhood stories of how Alec had gotten that adorable scar on his upper lip, or the time Jace and Alec had sparred and accidentally broken a good portion of the Idris kitchen. All heartwarming, enchanting Alec stories, but definitely ones that were far more private then he assumed he was supposed to hear. Alec had told him a fair number of these stories once, but now it just seemed so... private. So he lurked, one hand on the kitchen counter to hold him upright, and one hand firmly around a not-strong-enough drink. Everything here was just so Ragnor. 

Simon had just started on something about Isabelle's cooking the first time he'd been to the institute that Magnus saw the opportunity to slip out to the terrace. He downed his drink, set the glass on the table and slipped out with the kind of cat-like grace Chairman would be proud of. It would be nice out there, cold but silent and absent of any ghosts. Except the ones who seemed to be haunting him. Alec loved to read on the fire escape in Brooklyn, especially when the sun was just sinking and he could just barely make out the words on the page. He liked to strain himself, even while relaxing as if constantly testing whether he was strong enough. 

Little did he know he was always the strong one. 

Now the porch on Ragnor's house seemed all too familiar, and Magnus could almost outline the archer in his reading-peace. Every bone in his body ached to be with Alec, but being with him, and BEING with him were two entirely different mountains now. Now, he'd be asking about their relationship if Magnus went back in, and Magnus wasn't sure how much more his compressed chest could take. Magnus would have to explain who Camille was, and what she did to them, and how Magnus had broken Alec's heart. He'd have to explain that he too had been crushed, and had they made it out of Edom, would've told him a detailed history of who Magnus Bane once was. Hell----he'd even written it down in a little black notebook that could destroy the reputation he'd been working on for centuries--- but the Alec inside right now wouldn't understand the gravity of the sentiment. How much that would have meant to him, and how much it would mean to Magnus now. It was like they had just broken up all over again and that was one story even Magnus Bane could not enchant to sound good. 

"I thought I saw you slip out." A gruff voice spoke from the warmth of Ragnor's house. The brass door opened just enough to let Alec's broad shoulders through, and closed behind him to the sound of laughter from the shadowhunters. With the way night had fallen, the moon shined just on where they stood and Magnus could see every pore on Alec's pale face. His blue eyes looked reflective, and his lips glossy and radically un-kissed. Maybe Magnus could have done something about that in a different life. 

"I've never been good at family gatherings, especially ones I'm not apart of." Magnus deflected, thinking back briefly to Edom. That had been the closest he'd been to 'family' in centuries, and by no means was that a party. 

"I don't think it's intrusion if you're apart of it. They all seem to really like you." Alec said meditatively, his face contorting into the familiar contemplative look. Like a puzzle piece just needed to twist once more to fit, but Alec could still see the picture. "----I like you." He added as an afterthought, his porcelain skin betraying the blush that blossomed despite his eyes having never moved from the distance. 

Magnus smiled at the reddening of his cheeks, his chest bubbling with hope only for his rational side to suppress it. Alec had clearly been done with him before Edom---their kiss had just been a moment's desperation and Alec being the good man he is had just wanted Magnus' morale to stay alive until they could make it out. Pretending to be, or even getting into a 'relationship' with Alexander now would feel all too much like playing him, and if they were going to do this again, they would do it right. He couldn't let himself fall again if Alec didn't know what exactly he was falling for. 

"But----I'm getting the feeling we didn't last. Before I lost my memories, I mean. You keep dodging it, and only saying enough to leave me with more questions than answers and it's frustrating, honestly. I don't know what to think of us." Alec finished, letting his hands find the railing, and his eyes search the skyline. Alec may not be himself but damn did he sound like him. Magnus would have laughed then---if it had been funny. They hadn't even begun to date on the same level they'd once been, and already Alec could decode Magnus' clever evasion. Never had anyone read the elusive Magnus Bane like this. 

"It's complicated." Magnus replied, purposely not looking over. If he were to meet those blue eyes he'd yearned for so long for, he wasn't sure his resolve would hold, and he'd find himself yet again at the doorstep of his apartment kissing a shadowhunter who made his heart stutter. Or, he could be smart, and pretend their proximity didn't phase him. He decided to go with the latter. 

"I've got time. Maybe I'll remember if you tell it to me. With the way Izzy was cheering I'd assume we weren't all bad. Or at least as bad as Simon and my sister." His nose crinkled up then, and Magnus couldn't help but let out a small chuckle at the cuteness of it. Alec would've hated being called 'cute'. 

"What, you don't like Seth?" He asked playfully. 

"Of course one of the only flashbacks I've gotten so far was of him and Izzy in my room doing, um--- stuff," Alec's face reddened there, and Magnus was tempted to follow the trail down Alec's neck and into his shirt. "So I don't think the Alec before all this liked him too much. Or---maybe he did, I don't know." Alec sighed, his breath swirling in front of him and his long arms coming to wrap his head as it lay on the railing. He looked exhausted, as they all probably did considering the hour of the day. And the mental picture of Isabelle and Simon in the heat of the moment was probably not helping. 

"You liked him as much as any big brother likes the boyfriend. But Sylvester is alright." Magnus said, shrugging. In fact, he remembered Alec having a bigger problem with Clary, but going into the whole used-to-be-into-Jace thing was more of a topic for another night. 

"Did I do something?" Alec whispered so light Magnus almost missed it. But when he turned he was met with the intensity of Alec's imploring gaze, and Magnus swallowed before continuing to buy himself some time for composure. 

"No, it was... mutual." Their problems, not the break-up. But doublespeak was Magnus' speciality, after-all. 

"Well I'm sorry. For whatever it is, I can tell I really hurt you." And Magnus could tell from his look that he meant it. He was genuinely sorry for something he had no recollection of and it was just so ALEC that Magnus could have grabbed his shirt by the handfull and kissed the apologies off his lips. He didn't deserve to be loved by a boy like Alexander Lightwood, but Magnus was greedy enough to take it in any way. Somehow, Alec would never stop surprising the warlock who had once thought he'd seen it all. 

"I think I'm going to bed." Alec added, turning away to start walking towards the door back. Magnus watched him leave, but didn't say anything. Alec's hand had just come to rest on the handle when he paused. 

"You know, you don't have to sleep in the living room... if you don't want to. I don't really know why, but I know I sleep better with you next to me." Alec said, walking in then without an answer. Magnus could be smart. Stay out here until he cooled off, and then sleep on Ragnor's lumpy couch until dawn broke. Idris had a significant time difference from Brooklyn, but they'd still have to be up early if they were going to meet this 'week' deadline. Or...

Magnus strode back into the house, the fire dying in the old-brick chimney and the shadowhunters seeming to have snuck off to their respective rooms. Alec had chosen the first door on the right when they had entered and Magnus beelined for that now. He hadn't been able to sleep comfortably without Alec's body pressed against his, and now he might actually be able to find peace at night. He slipped in quietly, afraid that Alec was already asleep and that he'd wake him, but somehow Magnus knew he was still up. They didn't say a word, but Magnus stripped down to his boxers and moved the sheets enough to slip in next to Alec. Immediately Alec's muscled arms had opened, and Magnus had fallen into them; his head on Alec's chest as he could hear the soft patter of his heart, and Magnus slung his arm lazily around the shadowhunter's muscled torso. Magnus could feel the weariness start to ebb into his mind, and slowly, he began to drift off, completely at peace with the warmth surrounding him. 

"Goodnight, Magnus." He heard, just before his eyelids dropped. What a pleasant dream... 

 

A/N: hello angels i am so sorry for the delay!!! My computer broke, I got very very sick, and I have three exams this week so blame that on the weekend of no update's!! This chapter was slow moving because I wanted to get them to Idris and I saw the Malec date on the TV show so I was like 'hmmmm' yes Malec seems good right about now! We shall start with the action-y fighty scenes really soon I promise, but in the meantime thank you for all your support! It genuinely makes me smile to see!! Also know that I really value your opinion so if there's ANYTHING you'd like to see more of in this story let me know and I'll see what I can do! Thanks babes, onto ch.9!!!


	9. Search for the Holy Grail

"So where are we on leads?" Jace asked his company, still facing the sizzling pan of what he would deem breakfast, but would more liberally be considered a fire hazard. He was shirtless, the runes on his back and arms seeming to glow in the morning sun, casting his usual golden complexion in a deeper light. He felt more at peace then he felt he had ever been. There was something in his chest, something that felt suspiciously like nothing----like nothing was weighing him down anymore. The constraints around his heart lifted, and the beating coming in steady, normal pulses. He felt like he could laugh, and not feel bad about it; or he could enjoy the moment without immediately noticing the sense of dread creeping in. It was unfamiliar territory given his past months, but welcome nonetheless. 

He had slept in the same bed as Clary last night (without being tethered to a psychotic Sebastian), he had spent the night talking and laughing with his friends as if there was no place he'd rather be, and his best friend and brother was in a room down the hall. Jace was usually the pessimist, but honestly, even he could not find a flaw in the previous day's events. 

"Well, that depends on what you think the Morgenstern's could have done with the cup." Clary--- his beautiful, strong-willed girlfriend answered. Mindlessly she was sipping on a steaming coffee, the vapors rising and hiding her face partially. Simon and Izzy sat next to Clary, Isabelle's feet in the lap of her boyfriend's while she played with a knife, and Simon's nose in some comic book Jace had stopped caring about when Simon first mentioned it. The only two missing in his scenic breakfast was Magnus Bane, and the man of honor himself----who Jace knew would be especially cranky if Jace woke them up. Alec was usually the early riser, but something told Jace that the events that had just unfolded had probably drained Alec enough to warrant a little bit of sleeping in. Although Magnus' absence from the couch was questionable in its own...

"What are the odds Valentine thought to draw up a pirate's map to the treasure, to expedite this adventure?" Jace asked mockingly, focused solely on the eggs in front of him that probably should not be smoking as they were. 

"Slim." Clary responded, bemusedly. Jace let a breezy laugh pass through parted lips and he turned then to watch the gentle curves of Clary's mouth as she too smiled. It was a smile that shone like the sun, and Jace felt the warmth of the sun all the same when she looked at him. 

Next to Clary, Isabelle had apparently grown bored of her throwing knife, and now sat almost on top of Simon to comment on whatever part of the comic he was in. Jace let out a disgusted noise at the blatant couple-yness shown. Hypocritical? maybe. Was he going to make a spectacle of it anyway? You bet. 

"Ugh, Iz, you know there's like twenty bedrooms here, take it away or else I'll thrown up on the meal I've slaved over." Theatrically he put a hand on his stomach to show his rising queasiness, and as Isabelle flipped him a particularly unflattering finger, Jace's ears registered the best sound he'd heard in a while. 

"I didn't know eggs were flammable." Alec, looking dejectedly tired from the bags underneath his eyes yet a mysterious glint to his blue hues, remarked. His hair was damp, and he was dressed in what he would probably deem as 'presentable', signaling he'd been up for longer than Jace had anticipated. Something in his chest loosened at Alec's words, and he felt his heart soar with familiarity of the scene. Alec had always had a sharp tongue when it came to Jace, and knowing he was falling easily more comfortable around the blonde made the whole endeavor quite pleasing. It took Jace a few seconds to register Alec's words, instead of just Alec.

"Shit----" He proclaimed, throwing the pan into the sink and off the burner. Technically it wasn't flaming, but the yellow in the pan was now outnumbered by splotches of black. Oh well, coffee for breakfast it is, he wasn't about to cry over spilled eggs. 

"Well it's nice to see you up, sleeping beauty. We were beginning to wonder whether you'd snuck out the back window and made a mad dash for New York." Jace joked. Distantly Jace was aware that this was somewhat true. He did fear Alec would come to his mundane senses and forget them all over again, but worrying was always more Alec's job than it was Jace's. Or so he'd like it to seem. 

"Not all of us have the annoying Nephilim sense to wake up at the crack of dawn, shadowhunter." Now it was Magnus who exited the same room Alec had just appeared from. He looked decidedly less put together, with a pair of black silk pajama pants and hair that went every way but straight. His face was eccentric, however, and his steady green-gold eyes looked more alive than Jace had ever remembered. So that's where the warlock had slept. 

"And not all of us keep my brother in bed till the day is almost over." Jace noted, smirking slightly as he saw Alec blush. "Now put a shirt on, I think the attire for a mortal cup-hunt is more business than it is casual." Magnus rolled his eyes at this, but returned to his room, while the rest of them ate the toast that had survived the great Jace-fire of Fell's house. Alec took a seat next to Isabelle and said little until they had packed up and began to leave. It would be a long trip, but if Alec was with them, then Jace didn't really care if it took years. 

x.

 

Jace, having grown up in the country side knew he should not be so restless. That the horses they had stolen from Fell's manor were quick enough, and large enough to carry them at incredible speeds. Even Alec, believing himself to be a mundane had gotten a hold of it quickly, and off they had rode. But it all felt too tedious for his restless bones, and with the passing hours Jace could not help but yearn for the practicality of the New York subway. Or even that death trap Simon called the band van. Just something automated, preferably. 

Eventually (and much later than Jace would have liked), they reached the fringes of a dusky house barely outlined by the thicket of trees that consumed it. It was gray, with shambles for decoration and a kind of cabin in the woods vibe that Jace felt belonged more in a horror movie than in the beauty of Idris. The sun was still up, if even at a decline, and Jace could just make out the fiery outline of Clary as she paused with the group at the invisible line they rested in front of. Her hair was pulled back, and her mind lost in thought as evidenced by her features, and Jace longed to catch even a glimpse as to what was inside that beautiful mind. 

"Leave the horses here." Magnus announced, dropping from his own and tethering it to a nearby tree. The others followed suit obediently, Jace bringing up the rear. 

"Why can't we ride up to the front door, that looks to be somewhat of a walk to and fro, and in case you forgot, we're on a bit of a time crunch." Jace thought aloud, his fingers itching with impatience. Find the cup, get Alec back. If it was that simple why weren't they storming the castle of Magnus' informant? Alec may be standing with them, but Jace could still feel the cold ice of their dormant parabati bond, and looking at Alec's unmarked skin set him on edge. He had never felt so empty in his life, knowing his soul was only half that what it once was. And an Alec without a deflection rune peeking out of his collar was like watching one of their horse's do a backflip.

"Because, contrary to popular belief, warlocks do not take kindly to Nephilim knocking on their door day and night." Magnus gave Jace a pointed look, at which the blonde just shrugged. "And this particular warlock is..." Magnus' lips had closed together in a firm line, searching for the proper word to describe his comrade. "Unsteady." He finished thoughtfully, his eyes flickering to the distant house with uneasiness. Not all warlocks were on their rockers, and some shadowhunters might even say Magnus was apart of the losing it bunch, but if Magnus thought they should be wary, then maybe he would heed the warning. Maybe. 

"Another warlock in Idris? Magnus, that's impossible! The Clave was even unsure whether to let Ragnor Fell reside here, and he was a confidant of the Clave." Isabelle rebutted, her slender hands finding way to her hips in a stance that spoke of power. She was right, Jace thought. Ragnor was the only warlock Jace knew of that resided where the Shadowhunters lived, and another warlock, even one in the boroughs of the woods would surely have to be reported. Magnus however, looked unfazed as he regarded Jace and his sister.

"Even before Ragnor, this warlock has resided here, dear Isabelle." Magnus answered, looking away briefly from her dark face. "Agnieszka was here before shadowhunters even touched the Earth." 

Isabelle and Jace took a sharp intake of breath, their eyes widening at the familiarity of the name. Clary, Simon, and Alec however held matching looks of confusion and just as Jace had whispered a few choice words, Simon had already released a question. 

"Who is Agnieszka?" He asked, eyes roaming from Isabelle to Magnus. 

"Agnieszka is a myth. She hasn't been heard from for centuries, and when she was heard of, it was intelligible." Jace answered angrily. Had Magnus sent them on a wild goose chase for Baba the insane? She'd lost her marbles probably even before Jonathan Shadowhunter was born, and now he thinks they're just going to march up and make her sane enough to save Alec? Jace trusted few people with the safety and well-being of his parabati, and a half-deranged warlock did not make the short list. "Magnus, you can't be serious."

"She's not a myth, although Shadowhunters do treat her as such. She is incredibly powerful, and knew Jonathan Shadowhunter when he opened up your pretty little lake. For all we know she holds the answer to its discovery. Now if you have any better suggestions, Jace Herondale, I say out with them, otherwise Agnieszka it is." In that moment Magnus looked as Jace had always expected a warlock of his prestige to look. Cold, diffident, and powerful. Knowing Magnus as intimately as he did, Jace thought little of it, considering all this was in the name of a mutual cause. Jace still mumbled something sarcastic, shouldered his weapons bag, and began the path to old Baba's house in silence. He saw Alec fall back and into step with Magnus, their eyes meeting with a look that made Jace feel intrusive. 

Few made sounds as they neared the house, and Jace was only aware of nothing other than the sharp smell of decay when Clary's hand slipped into his own. She had always had a way of bringing him back down to Earth. And in this decrepit garden of Eden, he'd need an anchor. 

"HALT, WARLOCK'S COMPANY." A sound like nails-on-chalkboard rang out, seeming to come from both everywhere and nowhere simultaneously. Birds squawked and flew off, and Jace could have sworn the lightening abruptly dimmed in reaction to the command. Magnus had stopped with his hand out, grazing Alec's chest protectively, magic playing on his fingertips as he did, cat eyes glistening. With great effort, Jace's eyes focused on the shadows of the house, something in the far corner of the porch making the slightest of movements so that Jace could register that it was not empty. His heart thudded against his chest very fast, and his hand reached around Clary to stand in front of her, as if to stop the cruel sound from reaching her ears. She would have none of it, of course, and moved almost instantly around him to face the house as they all did. Shadow or no shadow she was always ready to defend. 

Magnus seemed to regain his footing first. "Baba Agnieszka, we come in peace." He sounded flat, losing all the flair that usually dotted his words. "The Nephilim are with me, as we come to request your help. I am----" 

"Jonathan!" The shadow screeched, and Jace tensed. How did she know his birth name? Her face was still hidden by the shadows, so he could tell nothing from the contents of it, but his hand gripped the blade on his side tighter. Nobody who called him Jonathan had ever been good...

"Yes?" He asked uncertainty, feeling quite stupid as he stood in the middle of a dirt path speaking to the darkness. He wasn't very good at remembering people, but he was fairly certain he'd never crossed paths with Baba Agnieszka before. 

"HUSH." The voice yelled again, and this time a face materialized. Or, something that had probably once been a face, but now looked like a marble statue that had been left in the sun too long. She looked to be cracking, but with the sharp undertone of once being able to pass as human. Her features were so incredibly pale, Jace felt if he squinted he could see through her, and the only definable thing about her was the black that covered her body from head to foot. Even the cane she held in one taloned hand was a deep ebony. She seemed both very large and very small at the same time, hunched but buzzing with raw power. Jace had seen a considerable about of warlocks in his time, but never had he seen one so eroded. "I speak to Jonathan."

Jace was about to fight her on this until she raised one sickly finger to a spot just beyond Jace. He turned incredulously, gruesome thoughts about Sebastian/Jonathan coming to mind and was only further confused when his sight was filled only by Alec, who looked just as dumbfounded as he felt. 

"Oh, I'm----" Alec started, but was cut off by Magnus' voice projecting, "Jonathan is just nervous, wise Baba." Magnus gave a pointed look to Jace that said something like 'don't say a word', and Jace was too stunned to say anything back. Alec had a few nicknames--- Alec, Alexander, one idiot had even tried to call him 'Ali' once, but never had he ever been called 'Jonathan.' 

"Is this the order? Have they come for me?" Baba asked dreamily, her eyes----black as night--- glossed over. The group all looked at each other in stunned shock, too surprised to respond before she continued. "Jonathan. I assume you have come to collect." She had snapped back into focusing on Alec again, his wide blue eyes staring straight back at her. 

"Yes, Jonathan has." Magnus confirmed, still looking both perplexed and tactical. "We have come for the Mortal Cup, lady Agieszka, we have new----" But Agnieszka would have none of it, and a hand shot up and Magnus began to cough as if he had been punched in the throat, doubling over and clutching at his jugular. 

"Hush, warlock! I will speak to Jonathan alone." Alec had reached Magnus side and was patting him soothingly as he straightened. But when Baba said 'Jonathan' again, Alec responded, his eyebrows knitting together but a fierce look of determination on his face. He had taken a step forward when Izzy caught his arm. 

"Alec, you're not going alone. She's clearly lost it, and you don't have a weapon." She whispered. By the intensity with which Izzy was holding Alec's outstretched arm, she made it clear there was little room to object, and Jace had to admit he agreed. Now whether Baba did however... 

"You may bring David along, but the rest stay outside. They'll upset the cat." She had pointed towards Jace this time when she'd said David, and although there was clearly no signs of any living animals here----especially no cat, Jace started forward with Alec in tow. He caught Magnus' eye, who had recovered wholly from the incident before.

"Wisdom, Jace. I trust you'll use it in this one instance." Magnus said gravely, cat eyes narrowed at Jace as he and Alec ascended the rickety steps. They creaked as if unused for years, but Jace barely registered that at all. They had reached the threshold, and with a rune for increased eye sight clarity, could see the mystical house of Baba Agnieszka. The inside of the house was a whirlwind of insanity, to say the least. There were relics, real, old time-y things that probably belonged in museums now. Scrap metal, and jars filled to the brim with shimmering mystical auroras littered the table and ground, and where there wasn't dust lying, there was spells. Written in something alarmingly crimson, and decidedly not Latin, written over and over again on every spare surface. Jace half expected old Baba to shove them into the oven like the old witch she was upon entry, but was even more surprised to find no appliances at all in her house. This was Idris, so unplugged was expected, but not even a gear looked to be from this century. 

"Oh, Elphas!" Baba said with a cackle, her laugh sounding eerily ominous in the house. She was faced away from Alec and Jace, talking to an empty wall, but Jace was not about to correct her. He just shared a look with Alec that made them both crack a smile. Jace would've brought up the time they'd dealt with that drunk-off-his-ass vampire, if Alec would have remembered. 

"Elphas, look Jonathan and David are back." She motioned back towards them, still facing the wall. She gave a large sigh after a minute, as if exasperated by something the wall said, and then puttered off, moving like a breeze and coming back all in the same breath. She held a sword now, gold-rimmed, and archaic looking, floating as if magnetized toward Alec. Alec looked toward Jace then, and upon Jace's nod, his hand reached out and grabbed the hilt. With the way his arm sagged upon holding it, Jace could only assume it was heavy, and Alec placed it in the empty sheath on his belt quickly, nervous energy clearly dancing in his skin. 

"Oh I----thank you. I must have left it here... last time." Alec said awkwardly to Baba. 

Slowly, Jace was getting the story together. Jonathan and David were common shadowhunter names, but primarily because of the namesakes. Jonathan Shadowhunter, who was of course, the first of their kind, and David the Silent, who became the first Silent Brother. Ironic, really, that Jace would be playing the role of someone with 'silent' in their name. But even worse that she could think they were them now. Jace had seen pictures, and the only resemblance was their hair colors, if frayed ancient drawings even did them justice. 

"Now really, Jonathan, what have you done to your eyes! They were so green..." Baba scolded Alec, her own black hues searching Alec's face like a map. Her eyes slid past him after a minute, that vacant look capturing her as her eyes widened. She gasped something quick, backed up, and then raised a hand again. 

"Oh." Alec said lamely, trying to recoup. "Contacts?" And Jace had to physically repress a sigh. Contacts, Alec, really? He gets the whole 'mentally a mundane' thing, but really? 

"What Jonathan means to say----" But Baba would have none of it. 

"Oh David, I know it's you who's lost the cup again! Shadowhunters have come to claim it, but I will not be so easily fooled! They take me for the fool, did you know that? When they denounce an oracle it's understandable, but when a sage preaches to them of wisdom! Blasphemous!" Jace nodded along, following her story as one might understand a toddler who was just learning to speak. There were words, but put together like that he could not decipher them.

"You know who to go to then, don't you? Go to the land that was once lost." Baba said vaguely, closing her eyes meditatively. She then picked an object up at random, an old pocketwatch by the looks of it with writing even Jace could not understand, and muttered something to it. It blazed purple for a minute, before Baba's old crazy eyes fell upon them again. She looked to Alec, handing the gold out which he took. 

"Oh... thank you." He said awkwardly, and just like that Baba had turned to speak to her wall again, this time in something that sounded Russian. She glanced back only once, muttering something about 'leaving, before their reckless companions destroyed her garden' (What garden, he had no idea, considering the front of her yard was entirely weeds), and Jace took that as his signal to leave. "Jonathan?" He asked jokingly, earning a familiar glare from Alec as they departed. When they reached the entrance, Jace could see the four left behind in different poses of worry, only to be alleviated by their presence. Alec moved pointedly toward Magnus, the clock held tightly in his grasp. 

"You don't suppose the watch is actually filled with detailed directions to an easy capture of the cup, do you?" Jace asked, serving his best shit-eating grin. Magnus sighed, otherwise ignoring Jace's comment, and began to trek back down the way they came, giving one last look towards the house with veiled skepticism. 

"Well, it's enchanted that's for sure. But with Baba you can never predict her magic. It could very well be something lethal we are passing around, or perhaps the greatest help in the world. One thing that's for sure is it's unpredictable." He noted, his tone dejectedly morose. Being a pessimist, Jace could decode that easily. 

"So we just wasted a day we don't have." He translated, looking over at Alec sadly. If they couldn't get this to work, then not only would Alec's memories be wiped clean of them again, but Jace and Izzy wouldn't even be allowed to be in the same city as him. Never to cross paths again, and always hoping for just a parting glance. No this had work. He would think up a plan, and they would save the day as always. Alec had always been his protector, and maybe once, just once, Jace could be the responsible one. 

Jace had gotten lost in thought as they made their voyage back, and they had probably made it about halfway through when he stopped with an epiphany in mind. Screw Baba and her insanity, they would get her to help! They had the High Warlock of Brooklyn, and more weapons than an armory, even with her archaic ju-ju. He was about to turn around then and there when several things happened at once. 

Clary, who had been walking behind Jace seemed to trip, and his reflexes kicked in instantly to catch her. Simon, who had been uncharacteristically quiet had begun to speak, staring with "Iz, your necklace----". And lastly, the shadows of the forest had descended on them, and with the quick scent of sulfur, a demon attacked. 

 

A/N: wow even sorrier for that delay than the last one!! I started with the Clockwork series and W O W if you haven't read it I'm saying 10/10 worth it. But ANYWAY Baba is from the codex and an old crazy warlock so I was like 'hmmm welcome to DAFE, Babs', and the drama starts!! As always let me know what you think! Thanks loves!


	10. There and Back again

Alec had never been a good fighter. He remembered a karate class he had taken when he was eight, just one singular class that he had hated, and more recently a boxing class he had taken with Garrett, which ended as soon as it started. Both times Alec had left thinking 'wow, there's something I'll never do again' and staying true to himself he never did. Although judging by the fact that his memories were all tainted he doubted even the karate had been real. All for the better, really. He'd been taken down in an embarrassingly short amount of time. 

Now however, it seemed overdrive kicked in. When the dark shadow had descended upon them, Alec was on the outside. Next to him was Clary and Jace, who had nearly fallen upon themselves, Magnus, who strolled with his hands in his pockets some small distance ahead, and Simon and Izzy, closest to the thicket of the forest that was not as dead as they'd thought. Isabelle's hand had begun to reach for the necklace in question as Alec first saw the body. It was big, slimy, and covered with legs that were currently attached to Isabelle. 

Immediately everything shot into action. Isabelle's whip had uncoiled free from her belt loop as she tried to fight back. Simon and his super strength was clawing at the beast as it danced tauntingly around, having dislodged from Isabelle, and Jace had unsheathed a dagger Alec had not even known he'd had. Everything moved so fast that Alec could not pinpoint where one moment started, and one ended. 

"Jace, the eyes!" Isabelle screamed, using one hand to clutch her throat, a dark crimson pooling beneath. The wound looked shallow enough for her to still move that impossible dexterity all of her runed friends seemed to possess, and her whip never hesitated for a second. Unfortunately, the demon was craftily using the trees to weave in and out of, the fading light making Alec's eyes strain just to keep up, and losing it at every angle. Jace acted as lightning might, one second he was next to Alec, and the next he was a few feet away. He had located and swung at the demon with a blinding force, but just as the blade was brought down the demon was gone again, slicing at air. The six of them turned away then, back to back in something of a circle. He felt justifiably out of place. With everyone but Magnus (who assumed had magic as his weapon) brandishing a sword, he was standing there like a deer in the headlights. Useless if not actually hindering their collective ability.

Alec's eyes roamed the ominous thicket of trees, seeing nothing but decaying branches and warped tree trunks. 

"Magnus, why can't you just blast the bastard?" Jace asked, panting heavily. Being on the opposite side of the blonde, Alec could not actually see his face, but somehow could perfectly visualize the determination in his hard-set eyes. 

Magnus' hands next to him moved lithely, but this time no joyous blue erupted from them. He swore heartily, his eyes still raking the forest like a predator. "It's Baba's protections. My magic doesn't work unless we reach the clearing, out of her protective shell." He replied in a tight voice. Clearly this inability was frustrating him, and Alec was surprised at the lack of composure in his voice. He was even more shocked how distressed this revelation made Alec feel. 

"What is it?" Alec implored after a silent beat. Slowly they'd been teaching him the fundamentals of their life, and he knew enough to say the thing that attacked them had been a demon, but beyond that he was lost. 

"A spider demon, it's----" Izzy took a sharp inhale, almost like a cry that had knocked the wind out of her. Alec looked over then, watching as she held her neck tightly again. "Iz?" Simon asked gently, but she just waved him off. "It's poisonous, so don't get too close Alec." She looked like she was struggling, and Alec was about to protest the worry for his own health when the sound of ruffling came about again. Isabelle's pendant glistened ruby in the darkness, placing an unsettling aurora on their little party. 

Again the demon pounced, this time closer to Simon. Simon swiped at it with a big blade but missed it within inches. Jace had come to his side, and with a great flurry of golden movements the demon had a dagger lodged into its torso as it screeched a terrifying sound. It writhed around, one of its great long arms coming for Jace's legs when Alec's hands were met with cold iron--- the blade Baba had given him, and without thought he had swung the great blade in front of him with a precision he never knew he possessed. The arm broke free from the demon's body, evaporating into something like black dust, and with this Jace had enough time to pull free a seraph blade, and strike the demon down till its fate joined the severed arm. They all stood there for a second, watching the empty pile of dust in front of them, and breathing hard. 

...Did he just cut of the arm of a freaking demon?!

"Dude, that was awesome!" Jace had said, breaking the silence. He took two great strides, purposefully ignoring the slain demon between them and clamped a calloused hand on Alec's shoulder. Alec however, still stood there uncertainly, holding the sword with a great awkwardness now, and none of the gusto that had come from a place Alec was unaware he even had. "The last time I saw you with a sword was battling that dot shaped warlock-but-actually-a-demon thing, but this was much better." He let out a laugh then, and Alec smiled along politely. Having no idea what a 'dot shaped warlock/demon' was, and feeling too exhausted to ask, he figured he'd just play along. Even if he could see the sadness creep into Jace's eyes as he realized he was sharing a joke with a stranger. Everything was a double-edged sword here. 

"Thanks..." Alec murmured, unable to think of anything else. Jace let his hand fall from Alec's shoulder, his golden eyes roaming Alec for something---remembrance, probably, when Izzy let out a cry. "Simon, don't touch it!" She said, backing away from Simon's raised hand. 

From what he could see in the dimness, Simon had his hand outstretched to Izzy's neck, which had pooled more blood than Alec initially thought. A paralyzing fear sunk deep into Alec's body, and his heart clenched uncomfortably at the look of pain on Isabelle's usually pristine features. Her eyebrows had knitted together, and thick sweat formed on her brow where it had not initially been. As Alec, she was always pale, but now it just looked sickly, like she had the flu, or had been running for quite some time. Simon protested, talking about applying pressure to the wound but Alec barely heard anything. He could only see the first moments the demon had appeared, how it had clutched to Izzy, and how Alec, useless, mundane Alec had done nothing. 

Eventually after some bickering, Simon had picked her up bridal style and yet again they were set on their path out. Jace had applied some runes prior to this progression, but swearing under his breath he had mentioned something about poison stopping the iratze from working. She'd have to be taken out of Baba's stretch of power to heal properly, a journey with time they didn't have. 

Izzy's head lolled as they walked, and eventually she had hidden her pale features in the crook of Simon's arm and chest, sleeping unsteadily. Now all that could be seen was the curtain of black hair that so mimicked Alec's own, and he desperately wanted to reach out and touch her. If just for reassurance that she was still breathing, even though the rising and falling of her chest answered that question perfectly well. For the first time since he'd met her, she actually looked like someone's little sister here. Smaller than her confidence hinted at, and as young as seventeen. He dropped his hand just as he rose it, knowing he didn't deserve to fret over her as the rest of them did--- not when he could have done something to prevent this ever happening. He didn't get to console himself when it was entirely his fault. 

They walked the remainder of the way in something of a silence, with only Isabelle's feverish dream whispers to sing through the stillness. Eventually they reached the clearing where the horses bucked, and as soon as Alec felt a slight pull--- Baba's force field probably--- Magnus' fingers bloomed a brilliant blue again. He seemed mildly happy about this fact, although his jaw was set in an expression of frustration. "Set her down carefully, Simon." He said with authority. It was the first time Alec had heard the warlock say Simon's real name instead of something ridiculously unfitting to him, and Alec could attest that it was probably due to the severity of the situation. It was clear in the group how much Isabelle meant to all of them, and her ragged, uneven breathing now was just setting them all on edge. She had bled so much that Alec could no longer see the runes on her neck.

Simon did as instructed, laying her down in the soft patch of grass that contrasted starkly with her black clothes and pale skin. Magnus set to work immediately, turning her head with light fingers and chanting something undecipherable underneath his breath. Giving in to his own selfish desires, Alec had dropped onto the ground next to Isabelle, his hand clutching hers tightly as if the contact itself could ground her to this world. If Izzy died here, in this vacant patch of land because of Alec's inability to act on his feet he would never forgive himself. Never. She was shaking now, her breathing shallow as if the pain had increased upon their exit. 

"Hang in there, Iz." He heard Simon mutter lovingly, his own brown eyes huge in his face and his hands clutching Isabelle's free hand like a scared child. He sounded lost, his voice strangely foreign and hollow for the excitable boy Alec had met in his dorm, and Alec could not even imagine what it would be like to look upon the face of someone you loved with such distress. If it were Magnus... 

"The poison is out." Magnus announced, breaking Alec's thoughts and sitting back tiredly, using one slender hand to wipe the sweat away from his own forehead. He looked exhausted and worn, each blink seeming heavy, like he could fall asleep there and then. Alec was still clutching desperately at Izzy's cold hand, her face showing no signs of alleviated pain except for the slight decrease in the dent between her brows. This was his sister, he thought vaguely, his sister who should not be in this position because of his recklessness. 

"There's some tents in the baggage I'll set up." A breath said that rung with indistinct familiarity of Jace. He heard the blonde moved towards the horses then, unpacking whatever it was they had brought. Without thinking clearly, Alec's free hand had come to lightly push the hairs away from Isabelle's face. It was strange, really. He knew nothing about this girl. Not her birthday, not her best friend, not her thoughts on Alec himself, and yet she had done all of this for Alec. She had all these memories, and all this sorrow when she looked at Alec, and he remembered nothing. Not a single detail as to why these people would go through all this trouble for some kid from Brooklyn. 

As the time passed, and the tents were set up, everyone paired off again. Isabelle was placed in the center of their congregation, with set intervals as to when each person would watch over her, and despite Alec's shift not being for another couple of hours, he found himself unable to sleep. Magnus lay next to him snoring slightly. Alec knew very little about magic, but from seeing his shallow face could conclude that the day's events had drained him enough to knock him out. His face looked so peaceful as he slept, almost as if his age were erased, and a twenty-something-year old stood in the place of a hundreds of years old warlock. He was beautiful, much too beautiful for Alec to have been able to even think about, much less date, and he had to wonder what this other-life Alec had that was so desirable to such an incredible man. Maybe his family owed Alec's money, or some love potion had made him drunk enough to like Alec, but whatever it was it baffled him. 

Eventually the restlessness took control, and Alec slipped on a shirt and trudged outside. The stars were beautiful from where they lay, bright, and untainted from light pollution. A slight chill had rolled into the air, and Alec could now see his breath, which swirled and disappeared with every passing second. His legs moved without consulting with his brain and distantly he was aware of how far he had gone from their campsite. He knew he should head back but here, the stars were so bright, and the Earth so quiet that he was enticed to stay. He found an old tree trunk and sat there, contemplating how in the hell he had gone from an accounting major at NYU to trekking some fantasy world with shadowhunters and warlocks and vampires. All of which were real, by the way. Maybe it was all one elaborate dream, and in a few minutes his alarm would buzz and he'd be late for class again. 

He was surprised how much the thought actually saddened him. 

But there was more than his own feelings. There was the well being of people like Isabelle, and Magnus, and Jace. The safety of people like Clary and Simon. Alec was causing problems where there shouldn't be----all for some fantasy holy grail that may or may not help Alec. Their group was drained----Isabelle hurt, and yet they still never faltered in their journey. Why go through all the trouble for someone so completely unworthy of the stress of it all? They all had each other, eventually they would be alright. 

The honorable thing to do would be to leave, he knew that. He could pack up the few things he'd brought and head out to someone like Baba, or just start walking till he hit civilization. He could go back to New York, make up his missed work, and leave the shadowhunters better off. He could pretend like this had never happened, and maybe----hopefully, they would forget all about it as well. 

He had just decided on the best execution of his plan when a voice startled him enough that he nearly fell out of his make-shift seat. 

"Contemplating running away, are we?" It was Jace, who despite his hazardous words plopped down next to Alec as if he didn't have a care in the world. Maybe he would help Alec in this escape plan? Maybe his compassion had just been an act, and seeing as how Alec harmed one of their own, the farce could now be dropped. Jace had a girlfriend, and a sister, and plenty of friends. Maybe he'd finally decided that Alec was not worth the effort. 

"How did you know?" Alec replied, cursing his own bluntness. He'd read enough books to know he should have lied his ass of here. Told no one, and taken off in the dead of night. But Jace had sat down, and Alec had openly spilled his very secret plans. 

"Because I know you." Jace answered easily, as if Alec should have known. With that amount of empathy in his voice, he would never let Alec run. For some reason this response angered Alec greatly, and before he could quench the storm building up in his stomach, his mouth moved with words he'd never thought of beforehand. 

"But that's just it, you don't! I'm not that Alec! I don't know what you mean when you say things about a dot warlock/demon, and I don't get it when you say something about Izzy's cooking, and you----you keep looking at me like I'll suddenly remember and when I don't you draw into yourself, like I'm personally doing this to hurt you! But I'm not! I---I'm not the Alec you're all dotting over... I'm just... Alec. Just Alec." He finished lamely, looking away so that Jace could not see the heat that had risen in Alec's cheeks at his own anger. He regretted being so straightforward but he meant what he said. He was tired of the remorse they all gave him, like they pitied him, or pitied themselves BECAUSE of him; it was enough to make a sane man mad! He didn't know who the boy with a bow and arrow had been, but he knew what he was now. And that was not a shadowhunter. 

"And I assume just Alec just instantly knew how to wield a sword?" Jace bit back, a surprising amount of anger lacing his own words. Alec turned them, and could see very clearly where the bags under Jace's eyes stood out in the pale moonlight. His golden eyes flared, meeting Alec's own and holding his gaze there as if extracting an answer with a mere look. How could HE be angry?

"That---that was instinct. I didn't have some brilliant flashback that told me what to do, I just swung! And not even fast enough, Izzy is----"

"Izzy is strong, and has far more training than you do right now." Jace interjected. "And if you really think I don't know you then how do you think I'd know you'd wander off at night, sulk in some corner, and then think about leaving to protect everyone? You may not know who you are but I do. And I can tell you that leaving right now is going to hurt a whole lot more people than it's going to help. Izzy and I could be deruned for what we're doing here. Magnus hadn't taken proper care of himself for weeks until we came up with a plan to get you back, and Simon---well there's no cure for Simon, so don't blame yourself, but if you seriously want to leave then I won't stop you. Just remember that this---all of this is because we love you." Jace finished, his jaw setting. Never had Alec heard a proclamation of love sound so dangerous, but Jace had nailed the impossible. He still had that strange flicker of flames behind his golden eyes but Alec could see the vulnerability in them like he never had before. He should leave. He SHOULD leave. 

But he can't.

"You're right. I'm sorry, I---I won't leave." Alec sighed, letting his eyes drift back to the stars. They only had a week right? So if they came up short, with no cup in hand then Alec would be out of their lives anyway. They could go back to being happy, normal (if shadowhunters were normal?) people, free of any Alec-shaped drama. 

"Good." Jace said simply, a small smile playing on his lips as if he were apart of an inside joke with himself. "Because I lied. I would have stopped you." 

Alec laughed at that, because somehow the scene seemed familiar. He didn't feel awkward talking in front of Jace like he did in front of strangers, and that had to mean something. Maybe his mind hadn't caught up yet but his body knew; knew that Jace was a good person, and that he loved Izzy dearly, and that Magnus... well Magnus was still his enigma. What were they? 

"Come on, let's go check on that sister of ours." Jace added, a fond expression on his usually stoic face. 

This was what a family felt like. People who joked, and bickered, and fought relentlessly and at the end of the day came home to each other. Maybe Alec would never feel completely at peace in this mind that preached of a different life but at least he could be complacent in the love he had fallen into. 

There were worse lives to live. 

 

A/N: Hope you liked it!! As always I'd love to hear any potential plot points you'd like to see/POVs you'd like to hear more from/ships who need more time to shine, etc. Thanks for keeping up with my slow updating ass. Until next chapter angels!


	11. Strangers in passing

Alec fell in and out of consciousness that night. He hadn't realized how exhausted he'd been until he'd laid his head down in the corner of Isabelle's tent, and promptly fell asleep. It wasn't his turn for watch technically, so Simon was still in there, but Alec had just felt the undeniable pull to be close to his sister that night. So he gave in, waking every few hours when the shifts came. When it was Jace's turn he had been too talkative for Alec to sleep to, and eventually Isabelle had woken up to their conversation. She didn't miss a beat, just started chatting casually as if nothing had happened. And Alec did have to admit that she looked impossibly healthy. She'd even stood up and gotten them to follow her on a walk as if to prove the point. Jace and Isabelle talked like old friends, and bickered like siblings----Alec couldn't help but feel like an intruder. 

Eventually the sun made it's triumphant return and the camp bustled to life as Clary, Simon, and Magnus woke up. They divvied up the sparse food they had stolen from Ragnor's place and Jace and Magnus started bickering about what to do about their plans. 

"No, no more warlocks!" Jace was shouting animatedly. "Baba was clearly out of her mind, and all we have now is some museum relic that gives us absolutely no help, besides MAYBE the time. The mansion's aren't far from here, we can search the rubble----"

"Why would Sebastian leave a priceless angelic cup in an abandoned house? Why don't we just assume he put it in the mail and it'll reach us in 3-5 business days instead?" Magnus deadpanned looking for support from the rest of the group. Everyone but Izzy seemed to glance away from his gaze, as if to say 'don't drag me into this', but Izzy of course didn't submit. 

"Or we could track the cup? If that's possible?" She didn't seem too confident in her own plan, but like everything Izzy said it came out sounding flawless. Alec still didn't understand how magic and all this stuff worked but judging by the look Magnus was giving this request was impractical. 

"I've heard of complicated spells before that can do what you're asking, but we'd need something of Jonathan Shadowhunters and I don't suppose you have a lock of his hair lying around, my dear Isabelle." Isabelle shrugged at this, as if to say 'I tried'. 

He'd heard of tracking before, and in one of Simon's spiels knew that these people---his 'friends' had used the same method to track Alec when he was sent to the mundane world. They'd used something of his----a weapon, probably the bow and arrow Izzy kept referencing and located him at NYU. He let his hand slid mindlessly down his side and was surprised to find his fingers met with a cool metallic feel rather than the gruff material of his pants. 

The sword. Baba had said something about Jonathan when she'd given it to him, and maybe, just maybe, he could actually be of help to this supernnatural powwow. "Wait---" he said hesitantly, unsure whether his words would make sense. "Baba gave me this sword----the shadowhunter sword or something, and she---she had said it was Jonathan's, right Jace?" Alec turned his eyes to the blonde for confirmation, and Jace's entire face it up like a kid a Christmas. He seemed proud that Alec had come to this conclusion, and slightly put off that he had not thought of it himself. 

"Yes! Alec, you beautiful blue-eyed bastard! Magnus, can you do it?" Jace turned away to look at Magnus, who seemed to be contemplating his entire existence with the look of unreadable confusion in his bronze features. 

"I'll need ingredients, but I think it can be done." His eyes leveled with Alec's, and for a moment Alec was shocked at how green they were in the morning light. How had Alec been smooth enough to date this guy? 

"So what, we forage through the forest for magical berries? Should we leave bread crumbs too?" Simon pipped up, his brown hair suffering from a wild bed head attack. Alec stifled a laugh at that, letting a soft chuckle escape his lips and everyone---especially Simon seemed surprised at this notion. They watched him with wide eyes like he had just striped down to his boxers and did an interpretive dance number. 

"Dude!" Simon finally said, breaking the ice. "You never laugh at my jokes!" He seemed proud, smiling so widely that his mouth took up half of his face. 

"Actually that's not true! He laughed in Seelie court when you made fun of the queen." Isabelle deadpanned, turning her attention from Alec to Simon. The disbelief on her face turning quickly to humor. Clearly this was a prized memory. 

"Oh yeah! But that was the last time, probably because the queen turned him into an old man..." Simon let his sentence trail off, and Alec had to shake his head to keep his mind from swimming. Seelie Queen? As in faeries? And what's this about Alec being turned into an old man? 

"Children, if you would." Magnus started, breaking Alec's silent reverie. "To answer your question, Soloman no, these ingredients cannot be found in the forest. However, I know of a man in Idris who has what we need, and if we ride out now, we could make Idris by midday." Everyone nodded along to this, even Alec who only understood bits and pieces. "However, there is the slight problem that a good half of you are celebrities. Jace, Biscuit you two will have to sit this one out. Especially together, you'll attract a crowd." Jace leaned forward like he wanted to protest, thought better of it, and shut his mouth with thin lips. Magnus continued like the whole episode never happened. "Our best bet is Alec, Isabelle, and Simon. Isabelle can pretend she has students from the academy with her if caught---but do not get caught Isabelle. I of course can't go, because well, warlock." He motioned to himself---as if every warlock had dip-dyed blue hair that stuck straight up, and tight denim pants that looked almost painted on. Somehow Alec got the feeling that Magnus was one of a kind. 

Inexplicably, Alec's heart dropped slightly when Magnus said he would not be joining them. It was stupid, considering he didn't know him at all---except that he got more mysterious as you unpeeled the layers, but the feeling was real nonetheless. It would give him time with Isabelle, who's rambling was his best bet at jogging a memory, and Simon who was actually not a bad guy; so in retrospect he'd live. 

After some bickering, they eventually they split up. Much to Jace's chagrin, he, Clary, and Magnus were going to some warlock sanctuary or lair or something that could figure out if Baba's clock meant anything, and he, Isabelle, and Simon were set to go to Idris. Magnus gave them explicit instructions on who to meet and how to fire message their location so they could all meet up, and soon it was time to part. 

Everyone seemed accustomed to leaving for battle, so no one but Magnus and Alec lingered. Magnus looked at him with such an unreadable expression that Alec wanted to scream. What was this? What are they? And why does Magnus seem both interested and repulsed by Alec? He said a simple "Goodbye, Alexander." that left Alec even more perplexed then before. He'd heard that before... 

Regardless, the two parties split. And soon it was just Alec, Isabelle, and Simon's prattling. Alec hung back after awhile, letting the two be all disgustingly-couply in peace. He needed time to think anyway, Magnus' words echoing in his mind as if on a loop. 'Goodbye Alexander' he'd said... 

He could see colors----and those colors were impossibly dull. Slowly shapes formed but it was like looking through a screen, where mere shadows were barely visible. One shape in particular formed in startling detail, and Alec could have recognized that long, lanky form anywhere. 

It was Magnus standing there---looking as ethereally beautiful as he always did, but with raw, impossible pain on his features. His eyebrows had drawn together and his lips were kept so tight together that they were slightly turning white from the pressure. Alec couldn't remember why, but he knew he was the cause of that agony and yet try as he might nothing good came out of his mouth. He didn't say anything comforting, didn't say what Magnus wanted to hear... no instead he did as Alec does, and rambled off with useless words. They were standing in a dark room that allowed no sunlight, so Alec assumed it was some place underground, and Magnus could barely even look him in the eye he was so sickened. Alec had never seen him so unguarded----and in that same breath so miserable. All Alec could think that it was all his fault. Every last detail was on him and there was no way to turn back the clock. He had been the reason Magnus looked so broken then. And with a shattered "Goodbye Alexander" he was walking away with heavy feet. The memory ending itself like a sad movie. 

"Earth to Alec!" A voice said---bringing him back to the sunny plains of Idris. Isabelle looked painted in gold with the way the sun hit her, and Alec was reminded suddenly that he was not in some grim sewer. He was struck with the knowledge that that was a look into his past life---and he was both happy and sad at the same time to have come to this realization. He remembered, which was for all intents and purposes relieving, but was that really something he wanted to remember? If he had hurt Magnus so much, then why was he here now---helping Alec? And why did the shadowhunters care for a guy who seemed to make endless mistakes with no real purpose? They were here---in the middle of no where on some impossible hunt because of HIM. Jace and Clary could be off honey-mooning or whatever after the hell they'd been through, and Simon and Izzy could be at the institute or some grimy movie theater watching whatever marathon Simon had picked. And Magnus? Magnus could be happy. If Alec left, he would have time to heal and realize that Alec was just not worth it. 

"I just uh---I remembered something." Alec said, cursing himself for being so straight forward. LIE, he told himself. Isabelle shouldn't have to relive Alec's sins----these flash backs were his penance. He would have to live here knowing he was a bad person unless he could grow the bravery to leave them. But even that in itself was no so easily executed. If he showed even a sign of hesitance at staying then someone like Jace who knew him too well would talk him out of it, and he'd stay here---ruining their lives. 

Isabelle's face visibly lightened, her dark eyes wide in her face. "Really!?" She squealed.

"yeah..." LIE, he reiterated to himself, "You're a horrible cook." He finished, just as Simon almost fell off his horse he was laughing so hard. Isabelle shot him a sour look that shut him up quickly and Alec was proud of himself for being able to divert the attention so well. 

"Welcome back big brother." Isabelle muttered, just as they had reached the peak of a seemingly endless hill. Just over the end was a city that spread so wide, and shone so brightly that Alec felt the need to look away. It was magnificent with it's winding archways and sky-scrapers that more embraced the sky than pierced it. Without Isabelle even saying it, he somehow knew exactly where he was. She of course, would say it anyway. "And welcome to Idris." 

He was only struck for a moment by it's beauty before that annoying little scratch in his mind appeared again. He'd been here---he knew that. There were memories, one especially dark, and one especially light that he knew happened to him but for the love of heaven itself he could not remember. Izzy and Simon had already made their way down the hill and Alec hurried to catch up, making it there just in time to catch the middle of Izzy's sentence. 

"----Simon, the Accords are still being finalized so downworlders are allowed in but do NOT make yourself known. If Lily Chen is here she'll want to kill you for any reason possible, and Alec? No matter who you see, or who sees you do not stop to talk to them. These are clave members who should not know you are here, so keep your head down and think of a fake name to say if someone asks you who you are." She strapped one of her long blades into the holster to her side and jumped down for the horse. Simon followed suit, but much less gracefully. 

"Alright so are we going to go all Han Solo and steal some storm trooper uniforms to get in?" Simon asked, making Isabelle smile something fond. 

"That would be if this were a rescue mission, but Leia is safely in a galaxy far, far away." Alec responded without truly realizing what he was doing. His room mate and his other NYU friends had been HUGE into sci-fi and Alec had to admit that he did have a particular affinity for them as well. They were all about bravery, and doing what's right in a tough situation---and Alec could remember thinking how much he wanted to be apart of something like that. To be apart of a group that would live and die for each other and Alec guessed that he had somehow stumbled into that. Now it was his time to both live and die for these people---if only he could get away. 

Clearly Alec's head had just exploded with the way that Simon and Isabelle were gawking at him again. Really, was the previous Alec so mean and sci-fi uneducated? 

"Dude, no offense but I like this you WAY more." Simon declared, earning a hit on the shoulder from Izzy. "Simon!" She scolded, but failed to erase the smile on her lips---a clear indicator that she was anything but happy. She started to walk towards Idris now, the boys taking the hint to follow and soon Alec was in the center of a fairy tell book. Everything was pristine and in white, with long winding patterns like the marks on Isabelle's body to cover things. There was a fountain, and marble houses, and towering buildings that made tall Alec feel so incredibly small. Everything was as grand as he could have assumed it to be for a shadowhunter, and yet still he found himself mesmerized. 

"Keep to the back alleys." Isabelle commanded, turning to a street between two grand houses. There had been a couple approaching from the other side that clearly startled Izzy enough to redirect, but soon they had come to a house that looked relatively cozy (for Idris). It had paneled windows that were blocked by deep crimson curtains, a small staircase leading up to a quaint little porch and the impossible vibe of never having been lived in. Alec had no further time to investigate as Isabelle had already held out one hand to stop the boys in their tracks. 

"You two stay outside. This is girl talk, and I doubt she would buy into the BS that I'm giving a tour to some Academy kids. No offense, but you don't really fit the bill." She left with no room for disagreement and Alec gave her none. With Isabelle gone it would be infinitely easier to sneak away from Simon, who could be distracted by an oddly shaped cloud. He wasn't really sure what his plan was yet---how to get out of Idris, and more importantly where the hell Idris was, but he knew that it was now or never. Once Isabelle got back he'd need one hell of an excuse to be alone, and once they were back with Jace and Magnus he had no shot in hell of being undetected. He had to act fast if he wanted to get any ground---find an airport or something. He knew there was limited technology in Idris but they had to get in and out efficiently somehow right? He would just tell the next passer-by he was a mundane and then they'd surely run him out of the city, right? 

"I'm going to check around back to see if I can look in, get a good image of Izzy." He said with as much authority as he could muster. He was several inches taller than Simon, and based on vibe alone he got the feeling Simon was somewhat intimated with him, so that was not hard. "You stay here, wait till she comes out." He tried to channel his inner Izzy or Jace and turned away to walk with confidence in the other direction, not bothering to look back and see if Simon had agreed. He was thrumming with anxious energy, walking as if his shoes were filled with stones and all the while he snuck down some dim side-street he couldn't help but feel sad. He liked Izzy's take charge attitude that radiated such love for those lucky enough to be recipients, and he liked Jace's well-meaning snark and the way he seemed to understand Alec on a different level. He liked how Clary didn't back down, and he even liked Simon for how genuine of a person he was. There was something about Magnus that made his heart swell, and his cheeks heat up unintentionally despite the chill in the air. There was something about the way Magnus spoke that left Alec hanging onto his every word. And there was something about the way Magnus looked at him that made him feel not just loved, but important. But the memory was all too real. He was a danger to these magnificent people in his past life, and he'd be damned if he continued the tradition in his new one. Never again would he make Magnus look so broken. 

It wasn't until the shadow was directly in front of him that Alec realized the shape was a person. He stumbled, trying to catch his footing and failing miserably. The figure didn't move, just stood directly in his path, and said in a smooth voice "Hello, Alec." 

So much for going undetected. 

 

A/N: Okay COMPLETELY unrelated and a shadowhunters Academy spoiler if you havent read it but my favorite moment is when Robert winks at Magnus after asking about why the baby is blue like Robert Lightwood, father of three does not know how babies are made. ANYWAY in relation to the story I apologize for the lateness, life is crazy but I'm getting back into writing slowly but surely. Who do you think it was that spotted our sneaky little Alec departing the scene of the crime? Thanks for sticking with me, more to come!


	12. twice lost

"So Magnus" The annoying blonde nephilim started, elongating the 'so' with unnecessary extra o's. Magnus could already tell it was going to be another spiel of what Jace thought was cute sass but what was quickly becoming the headlining act in why Magnus so deftly tried to evade shadowhunters (with the exception of Will Herondale, and you guessed it, a certain Lightwood). "---Any other bat shit crazy friends of yours you'd like to show and tell? Perhaps one that can give us LESS than nothing, seeing as how everyone else has just given us flat out nothing." Magnus knew it was meant to seem like his usual relaxed snark, but even he was not blind to the tension in the blonde's shoulders. He held himself tighter now, as if afraid he might break, and Magnus couldn't help but wonder if that was just a symptom of a severed parabati bond. He was hurting just like the rest of them, but that did not mean Magnus was going to let him off easy. 

"Actually yes, there's one who's particularly adept at shutting up insolent teenagers." He had never felt older than right now, using the words 'insolent' and 'teenager' in succession. He felt to really complete the image that he should be holding his weary back with his right hand, a stern wooden cane with his left, and his voice rising about getting those rotten kids off his lawn. Now that he had mentioned it, his back did feel a bit achey... Maybe stress added to his age? 

The sun was now starting to descend since they had left the empty remains of Magnus' missing friend's house. 'Missing' was cynical Magnus' attempt at being optimistic. A lot of warlocks had gone 'missing' since the days of Valentine Morgenstern, and something told Magnus that those warlocks would never be found. Regardless, the sun cast a sunny disposition on the valleys of Idris and even Magnus, who in the presence of Jace Herondale hated the nephilim more, had to give the shadowhunters some credit. They did have a beautiful home land. 

Magnus let out a sigh as they began their trek back. His arms were sore, his magic weak, and all he truly wanted was to be able to curl up around Alec like they used to. He wanted to laugh at the same stupid jokes they'd once made, he wanted to share those knowing looks that meant they had a language and understanding only they were in tune to, and he wanted to show his love without restraining it, like he was now. But Magnus had to remind himself that even if Alec didn't have amnesia; he would still be unable to do those things with his shadowhunter. Some things were just not meant to be.

Jace, Biscuit, and Magnus were slowly approaching their pre-determined meet-up spot, which Magnus had decided had considerably less Alec Lightwood then he would have liked. Since no red flairs or search parties had been sent out, Magnus knew that Alec, Izzy, and Simon were fine, but still, he hated having to look at a blue sky instead of a certain pair of sky-blue eyes. No. He thought sternly. Right now he was not going to think about Alec, worrying about the state of their relationship was slowly killing him and all he wanted right now was one night of uninterrupted sleep. 

"How much longer do you think they'll be?" Biscuit asked lightly, pointing her question more at Jace who's mouth she'd probably rather see moving. Magnus was in a bad, sassy mood and he knew it. He tried to think back to Paris, or India, or any of the several places he had gone with Alec what felt like years ago but his restless mood would not budge. So instead he decided to set up camp in preparation for the other group's arrival.

"Soon. I know Idris isn't really Izzy's favorite place anymore..." Jace said, his eyes glossing over in that way only Lightwood's possessed when talking about Max. 

"And I'm sure they don't want to deal with Skylar's mindless rambling for more than a day anyway." Magnus added, creating a momentary connection between him and the blonde Nephilim. Jace snickered, but biscuit seemed to find it considerably less funny. 

"Skylar isn't even close to Simon. I don't even think it's a boy’s name." Biscuit said, rolling her eyes as if scolding Magnus like a mother would. 

But Magnus was far above the age of being affected by scolding. "It's unisex." He claimed, feigning hurt at her insinuation. 

Eventually Clary and Jace started off on whatever it was celebrity angelic couples talk about and Magnus was left to his thoughts again. His thoughts, and the peculiar scene of Simon Lewis wildly rushing towards them, alone. 

"Simon?" It was Clary, phrasing his name as an unanswered question. He was in front of them within seconds thanks to being undead and all, but even then Magnus found he had taken much too long. Where the hell were Izzy and Alec?

"Izzy is still in Idris, she met with the person Magnus sent us to, and she took a little long and so I wasn't surprised when Alec got worried and I know I probably should have questioned him more, or called for Izzy, or---"

"Simon!" Magnus interjected, his senses on high alert now. "as much as we all appreciate the commentary, we need to know, Where. Are. The. Lightwoods." He enunciated every word perhaps a bit too extravagantly but right now he was too anxious to care. Magnus had been there when the Idris wards fell. He knew the Nephilim could be slaughtered. 

"That's just it!" Simon exclaimed, his brown eyes wild with nervous energy. "Izzy---she went off to find him, but Alec---he's just gone. I lost him..."

"HOW DO YOU LOSE A SHADOWHUNTER?" Magnus thundered, feeling all of his exhaustion, frustration, and anger seep out of him. In hindsight he knew he shouldn't have yelled at Samuel. But neither he nor Jace got the memo. 

"You didn't think to follow him wherever he was going? Considering he's basically walking blind in Idris? That thought didn't cross your mind?" Jace yelled. If Simon still had a functional circulatory system, Magnus was sure his cheeks would have flushed right there and he'd be struggling to find his breath. Seth never did well when under pressure, but luckily his platonic counter part stepped in before Simon could get too flustered. 

"Hey, it's not Simon's fault! For all we know Alec left on his own account, and it's not like Simon was supposed to be babysitting Alec! I'm sure he's fine maybe Robert and Maryse found him?" Of course Biscuit and her eternal optimism had to make its guest appearance. Magnus was still fuming, but he'd decided to bite his tongue before he really lashed out and said something he'd regret to the group of shadowhunters he'd (regretfully) actually come to care for. 

"No that's the first place Izzy and I went to..." Simon mumbled to his feet, barely audible. For once Magnus was actually aggrieved that Maryse and Robert were MIA. 

"And where else did you look?" Jace looked to be falling apart at the seams now, and for a fleeting second Magnus could really see the relation to Will Herondale in him. They both burned so brightly, but when the flame was extinguished so was their guard. It was beautiful and sad all in the same breath. 

"We went to the consul, or Izzy did since I'm kind of not supposed to be here, and Alec wasn't there, and we went to the Penhallows, the Blackthorns, basically every family Alec's ever been in contact with and we didn't see him once. We didn't really ask straight out though, considering Alec isn't supposed to be here either." It made sense, it really did, but Magnus felt his rage was justified. He wasn't mad at Alec, heavens no, and he wasn't even really mad at Sherwin, but someone upstairs really has it out for him. In situations such as this, Magnus has to wonder whether his dad has more control than he thought because if so, then this was a perfectly devised plan on his part. Magnus was utterly, and completely wrecked. Alec was missing, they only had days before Jace and Izzy would be taken off the case, and the mortal cup was about as close as tranquility at this point. 

"Maybe... I mean you don't think that MAYBE Alec could have run away on his own?" Clary asked, pointedly looking away from Jace. Jace did the opposite of what Magnus expected and seemed to deflate at her question instead of blatantly disregard the accusation. Surely Jace could not think Alec wanted to rid himself of them so quickly? 

Jace sighed heavily, his golden eyes meeting none of theirs. "He told me he was going to leave last night." It was barely a whisper, a stark contrast to the usual boasting and self-confidence that usually inflated the Nephilims words. 

"WHAT?" Magnus asked through gritted teeth. Was this not information he had felt needed to be shared with the class?

"I---I found him sitting in the dark last night, and I knew that look he had---it's the one he wears when he blames himself" Magnus exactly what look Jace was talking about. "But I convinced him not to go, I know I did. He wouldn't have run, not without saying goodbye." And Magnus didn't know whether he agreed with Jace because he pitied him, or because he pitied himself. 

"Well Isabelle is still in the city, and I say we follow her. The fey are in council right now, and Izzy said---" 

"Wait. The Fey are in council right now?" Magnus questioned, his mind filling with visions of the Seelie Queen. She was beautiful (not really his type, but objectively beautiful), and ruthless to boot so if the Seelies were in town it was not pleasant. He'd been somewhat restricted in his contact with the fair folk however---as it soon became evident that his ex-maybe-not-ex boyfriend had killed one of their best knights. Meliorn was never someone to fret over, in Magnus' opinion, and considering Magnus was dying in a hell dimension at the time, he didn't really care. Sue him. 

"Yeah, that's why Isabelle's so frantic. You know how the fair folk hate Alec, and Izzy said they've gotten lots of reports of Fey threats to Alec. Always in passing, never enough to go to the clave with it, but definitely still there. I know they were relieved when the council voted not to search for Alec." Jace stiffened behind Magnus, clearly unhealed from the wound that was Alec's trial. "The Night Children are here too, and some warlocks. No offense Magnus, and obviously present company excluded but Alec really isn't that popular with the downworld." And Magnus had to give that to Simon. The fey hated Alec for Meliorn, the night children hated Nephilim in general for involving Raphael in their civil war, the lycanthrope's hated Nephilim for the Praetor's destruction, and warlocks hated Alec specifically for his romantic involvement with a warlock who should remain nameless. 

"Yes, thank you Shermin, I'm well aware of Alexander's social standing." Magnus deadpanned, his mind running in circles about what to do next. How would they find a hidden 'mundane' in a city of shadowhunters out to excommunicate him, and downworlders out to kill him? Only his Alec could get into such a predicament. 

"So basically what you're saying is that it could be anyone in Idris right now with Alec? That narrows it down." The blonde said to Simon, who still seemed to be gathering his bearings. Magnus himself was trying to focus on staying afloat because if what Simon was saying was in fact true, than Alec could be lost, tortured, or worse---dead and they'd have no way of knowing. Not with Jace's parabati bond severed. Clearly Jace was on the same thought process, as his hands had balled so tightly the knuckles were turning white. 

"Well Izzy went to talk to the council and check the wards for any unsanctioned departures. I'll talk to the vampires, Magnus you talk to the warlocks, and Jace and Clary can you find whatever fey's are not in council?" Simon asked with authority, a new look on the daylighter. Magnus would have been pleasantly surprised at this new self-assured Simon, but frankly he didn't care about anything but Alec's safety right now. He could only assume Simon was taking the reins because the usual point-people, Jace and Magnus, were a little bit frazzled right now. 

"Of course. Fire message if any of you find anything, and remember that Alec cannot be caught---by anyone. We still have a few days, alright? The week's not over, Alec is still coming home with us. That’s a gurantee." Jace proclaimed, with no room for argument. For once, Magnus actually found a connection between him and the blonde. What a brave new world. 

"Alright, so we're off to see the wizard then." Simon mumbled, turning away so that the others could collect their things for the journey. He was moving as nervously as a vampire could, and as graciously as Simon could. A vampire Simon was still a weird site to Magnus. Not that he really cared about Santiago right now. 

Regardless of where Alec was, Magnus knew he could not be safe. If he were caught by a shadowhunter, he'd be put in front of the clave and given no further chance to redeem his old life, and contact with any downworlders (Magnus, specifically) would be forbidden. If caught by a downworlder the consequences were intensely more severe, and if Alec were all alone in a city like Idris---Magnus could only fear the unknown. His chest felt immeasurably hollow, like he was missing some very vital organs and that he could just drift away with the wind at any second. He felt much like he had when he'd come to on the floor of the Accords Hall. His right hand patting the ground next to him only to realize Alexander was not lying there. That Edom had not been a dream. That Alec had given himself for them.

Magnus' jaw set thinking about the memory again. He would not let his problems become Alec's war---not again, and if that meant tearing Idris apart limb from limb to find the blue-eyed boy then so be it. 

"Alexander, we're coming." He whispered, setting off towards Idris. 

 

A/N: Wow long delays I apologize!!!! And side note: the shadowhunters season finale was SO GOOD like they incorporated a few book things that made my tmi heart SOAR like Simon the daylighter is a thing now my smol son!!! But back to the story, I hope you like it!! Now who do you think caught Alec last chapter? ;)


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